Their bouquet represents all things romantic and Bohemian, with Nina's Orchid, Dan's Daffodil, Stacey's Carnation, Casey's Hyacinth and and Emily's Wax Flower Weed.
On the drive to the space, Dan tries to get the women to focus less on building and more on design so that he'll be able to have his voice, er, daffodil, heard. He, like any good man, just wants to shop instead of build. But Nina keeps muttering about building a coffee table.
Dan, I fear, is doomed.
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The women and Dan shop for furniture that has romantic shapes and lines because they're all about the romance. Look at the romantic legs on that desk.....ooh that chair is romantic.....kiss me, Dan. At the apartment, they decide to use Nina's tried-and-true-because-she's-done-it-once-already-this-season method of taping the walls and creating moldings. I feel sleepy because I have seen this before.
As usual, Dan the builder comes out, and he's hammering and sawing and hanging and screwing.....screwing himself out of the competition, I fear. The only saving grace was that there was a nice lingering camera shot on Dan's, er, derriere as he left the apartment to get back to his woodworking shop.
The ladies, well, not Nina because she's a bitch, worry that Dan isn't doing enough of his own design work. Nina, instead, calls Dan her assistant. I shout at the TV: Dan! Look out for that bus! Nina's driving it right at you!! Dan! Daaaaaaaaan!
Nina puts her bus driving license away long enough to create a mural for the wall; another idea that she has trotted out and beaten to death right before our eyes. A mural? With bold colors and squiggly lines? She.Is.A.Genius!
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Take a look:
THE JUDGES WALKTHROUGH
This time the teams are allowed to stay in the presence of the Three Queens as they tour the spaces. This way they get to hear them mutter and stammer and order gin martinis.
In the woman's, and Dan's, apartment, the muttering includes We’ve seen that before which is said in front of a never-before-scene mural. There is a bit of I don't see anyone in this room when they tour the men's bedroom.
I think that's crazy talk. I see all of the men in that bedroom, I shout.
For me, the women's apartment is too much. The wall color and the fake moldings; that mural....Nina; it's kind of a mishmash to me. But the men's space seems, well, soft and clean and minimal, which is what they set out to do.
THE JUDGING
Monkey wrench!
The judges no likee either team completely so they'll evaluate each one individually.
They call out names: Nina, Courtland, Dan...who says Thanks...signalling that he doesn't know good design from a hammer, and Alex.
Bottom Four!
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The judges likee Tom's luminosity and biceps, or was that just me. They also give props to Casey, Stacey, Michael, and Emily, though no one wins or has immunity or has to take their shirt off. No ladies, not you.
Nina, Courtland, Dan and Alex head off to make their host presentations.
In the judges chambers, they begin to rip apart the designers, from stem to petal.
Courtland starts to talk about the Calla Lily and how it blankets itself and how that means he wanted the shelving to represent the flower. Shy little paint chipper, Alex, perhaps still reeling from Courtland's semi-gloss barbs, announces it was Michael who wanted the bookshelves. Courtland stammers, Wow! I hear the roar of the bus engine.
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Dan talks endlessly about daffodil clusters, and clusters of daffodils in the fields of Arkansas. But when the judges say they don't see his design aesthetic--I always wanted to say aesthetic--he tries to defend his construction projects, pointing out that the swing Nina commanded him to build is really a swing.
Vern stomps his little feet--well, to be fair, he doesn't actually stomp them since, from a sitting position they don't reach the floor--and shouts, You're not a contractor, Dan! Dan winces. The writing seems to be on the wall, and it says, Bye-bye.
Then, in pure Nina style, she claims she is all over that room, from the bold paint choices to the couch--that she personally selected--to the fabrics. I think she even put in the windows, hung the balcony, and wired it for WiFi. She does not, however, mutter much about the mural, which is good because I think Candice would have Joan Crawford'ed--I know....not a word--her.
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Alex, poor muttering, mono-syllabic Alex, says his Snapdragon is simple, like asparagus. Candice falls off her chair, and points out that nothing about the Snapdragon is simple; only Alex seems simple.
But then it happens. Alex, perhaps recalling his show opening declaration of stepping up his game, announces that what the Snapdragon really represents is not fluffy or frilly or flowery, but strength and determination. Shocked at the nerve of him to speak out in their presence, the Three Queens do, however, give him credit for speaking from the heart.
THE HOST CHALLENGE
Dan is friendly, and cheerful, like a daffodil, but he stammers and warbles,and doesn't so much as talk of his flower design--in fact he never utters the word daffodil--as much as he talks about his construction business and points at stuff. In the end, he sits on the bed, in defeat.
Alex, on the other hand, seems self-assured, and talks of the strength of the flower, and how he brought that into the room. He is stepping it up, and the judges see that.
We hear them muttering about changing their minds, and announce that Contractor Dan will take his tools and leave.
Some where in the distant I hear a bus horn followed by a manly scream.
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