Mark Souder, Pro-Abstinece Adulterer

I hate to say it, but I just love when one of these so-called conservative-family-values-traditional-marriage-religious-zealot-wingnuts gets caught putting his Little Politician somewhere it shouldn't be.

Case in point, one mighty wingnut, Indiana Congressman, and God-fearing family man and Republican, Mark Souder, has resigned from office over an affair with a female staffer.

Souder sniffled, wept, and choked up, as he said he had "sinned against God, my wife and my family by having a mutual relationship with a part-time member of my staff."

Honey? Mutual relationship? You schtupped her over and over again. Mutual relationship, my ass.

From an email interview, he added: "I feel just awful. It is a nightmare. Can't believe it is happening. But it is best for Diane and I, who love each other and have a firm foundation to build upon."

Well, Mark, it's a nightmare of your own making. And I love how he really takes no responsibility for his f***ing around, but spends the majority of time talking about his wife, and how much he loves her.

Yeah, he must have been loving her a lot when he was slipping it to the staffer,

But then he goes on, opening his mouth and inserting his foot: "I'm sick of politicians who drag their spouses up in front of the cameras rather than confronting the problem they caused."

I imagine, Mark, that the last place your wife wanted to be, as you announced to the world that you really don't give a rat's ass about your marriage vows, was standing at your side.

"I believe it is the best decision for my family, the people of northeast Indiana and our country."

Au contraire, Mark. The best decision would have been to keep your pants zipped, but apparently it's just too hard.

Pun intended.

And, to heap a little irony on the pile, the woman with whom Souder has been giving MiniMark to is ALLEGEDLY part-time staffer Tracy Jackson.

But what isn't alleged is that Tracy Jackson played another role for Mark Souder, other than Assistant To His Crotch. She played the role of interviewer for a web video show that Mark Souder created to discuss the values of the day, including a video on, wait for it, it's rich, it's worth it, abstinence.

He's a big fan of abstinence. ALLEGEDLY.