Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Hey! Oklahoma! WTF!?!?!?!?!


I mean this as nicely as possible, but, er, what the fuck is wrong with you people in Oklahoma? Are you electing these asshats for fun or for sport, because, seriously, if you believe the crap that your politicians are spewing, I have one word for you: secession.

Yes, I said it. Take your idiot politicians with their backassward views on anything and everything, and form your own country. I have suggestions on new names: Asshatatonia; TooStupidToLiveburg; Bigotryville; Homophobiopolis. Or, my favorite, ShutTheFuckUppity.

Well, I guess I got a little ahead of myself. Let's backtrack a bit, shall we? Back to the days when all you Oklahomans had to be ashamed of was Sally Kern and her special brand of bigotry, homophobia, hatred, and downright stupidity. I'm sure that was bad enough for you, being known as Sally Kern's home state, but you didn't stop there. No, you went and gave us state Senator Steve Russell, as asshat for all time.

See, while Sally will tell you that The Gays are responsible for everything from terrorism to global warming to that new Jay Leno at 10PM fiasco, Steve Russell wants you to know that being gay is akin to, and there aren't many better ways to put this, corpse fucking.

Yes. Gay = Necrophilia.

And because we gays love to have sex with dead folk, at least in the perverted mind of Steve Russell, he wants the state of Oklahoma to opt out of federal requirements for carrying out the newly amended hate crimes law. Steve says the newly passed Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, which extends hate crimes law protections to include actual or perceived gender, sexual orientation, gender identity and disability, oversteps the bounds of the federal government and hinders free speech and religious freedom.

He's falling back on that old anti-gay chestnut about giving us special rights, you know, like the right not to be killed. Makes no sense, because, if we love fucking dead people so much, you'd think at least half of us would want to play the dead one.

Steve Russell, speaking out of his cavernous ass: “The federal government should not be creating a special class of people, and that is just what they did when they passed and signed this bill. All crimes against another person have some level of hate in them, and people can be assured that our laws that protect people against crimes such as murder are sufficient to protect everyone.”

Let's tackle that one first, shall we dickhead? I've explained it once before: if a woman is held at gunpoint and her purse stolen, that crime is hateful, but if a gay man, like, oh, I don't know, a young man in Puerto Rico, let's say, is beaten, decapitated and dismembered simply for being gay, that would be hate.

Get it, asshat? There is a difference.

But Steve doesn't stop there, and this is where we get into corpse fucking [say it aloud, it sounds even more disgusting.....I'll wait] he adds, “Sexual orientation is a very vague word that could be extended to extremes like necrophilia.” There you have it. We want to fuck dead people, like a pornographic Sixth Sense....I fuck dead people.

And Russell goes on to voice his concern that if someone is attacked and killed for his or her sexual orientation, the suspect could pass the blame onto a religious leader who preached out against the lifestyle of the victim who was attacked.

That would be called Free Speech, you political hack. For the love of Portia de Rossi DeGeneres, look it up. You can say anything you want, short of inciting violence. Any preacher can stand up and say homosexuality is a sin, and it's bad, and all them gays are going to burn in the fiery depths of Hell, but he cannot say, Go out and kill a fag.

Do you see the difference? I'll hold up until you pull your head from your nether regions.

Better?

Probably not. See Steve, you can hate me, you can call me all sorts of vile names and spend way too much time thinking about what I do sexually [sidenote: what you do sexually is the last thing on my mind, so I wonder why you're so concerned with gay sex] but you cannot beat me, maim, me, kill me, dismember me, because I'm gay.

One final thought, Steve, go, um, fuck a corpse.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Let's get you a job at CNN or MSNBC. This stuff is too good and needs wider publication!
I. Mean. It.
N

Kyle said...

Love waking up to Bob Talk. ;)

I wouldn't expect too much from him Bob. He can't even make the simple distinction between anger and hate, nor can he make the distinction between sexual orientation and paraphilia. Same stale, incorrect statements from his side of the fence. The only reason his statements carry any weight at all is that there are way too many people in his state that don't care to know those distinctions either.

Sean said...

The problem I have with hate crime laws is that people think they are to protect minorities. The reality is, if existing laws were properly and equally enforced there would be no need for hate crime laws but minorities are seen as less than and as such less deserving of protection, equality and respect.

frogponder said...

If something happens to me, a heterosexual woman, it is because I had the bad luck to be in the wrong place at the right time. A crime of opportunity and I am a victim of that situation.
The perp did not pick me out because of 'ah, ha! A heterosexual woman!' Therefore I am relatively safer in safe situations. A lesbian woman does not have that assurance.

Jim said...

I was talking to a str8 friend about this just this last weekend. I asked what he would do if a woman came on to him that he was not attracted to, even felt disgusted by... he said he would decline her advances. Then I asked him what he would do if a guy came on to him. He got it and said the same thing; he would decline the advances. A straight man has no reason to beat and kill someone because they "think" that a gay man just "might" make an pass at him. This is just ignorance! Complete ignorgance!

Miss Ginger Grant said...

Oklahoma is the asshat capital of the world!