Saturday, August 25, 2018

It's Snarkurday!


I’m’a just say it: Kim Cattrall was right! Her former Sex and the City co-star and TV BFF, Sarah Jessica Parker, really is a not nice person.

It seems SJP ALLEGEDLY became very pissy at a shoe event held at her very own signature store at Las Vegas’ Bellagio—SJP by Sarah Jessica Parker—after discovering that a 14-year boy was filming her without her express permission.

Seriously. She is Scary Bradshaw!

One of the attendees was one Tonia Ryan, a stylist, who brought her 14-year old son Derek with her to the shoe party and wanted him to film her while she asked SJP which shoes she should buy. Derek began filming while Mom waited off to the side for her big moment and that’s when SJP saw the boy taping her and shrieked for security!

On the video SJP is heard saying:
“Put your phone down … You guys have to have experiences, nobody’s living, everybody is just walking around.”
Well, that sounds kinda nice, like maybe SJP wanted the boy to “experience” her shoe store and not just film it, but then she made the boy delete the video, harassed him until he did so, and then informed this fourteen-year-old boy that no one got a picture of her unless they bought a pair of her shoes. … or put a boatload of coins at her feet.

As I said, Kim is right.
We always hear about ALLEGED cat fights between women, but what about cat fights between men … or at least boys like Drake and Kanye.

Drake was performing in Chicago, Kanye’s hometown, when he subtly changed the lyrics to his song “Know Yourself” in order to suggest that Kanye’s record YE had “flopped”. Instead of rapping the original lyrics:
“Had a job sellin’ Girbaud jeans
I had a yellow TechnoMarine
Then Kanye dropped, it was polos and backpacks.”
Drake changed the last line to “Kanye flopped.”

Oh snap! How will Kanye ever live this down? He’ll probably check himself back into the hospital and Kim will take to social media to suggest Drake is gay.

That’s how they roll.
Kelly Ripa has been on television for three decades, and a lot can change to a person in thirty years …like going from Regis Philbin to Whitebread Seacrest.

Or, maybe, because they love social media, they post a throwback picture on Instagram, and people in the comments ask if it’s supposed to be a Spot The Difference game between Kelly in the 90s and Kelly in the 10s.

See, it all started when Ripa posted that picture of her and her husband of 22 years, Mark Consuelos. It didn’t take long before several people pointed out that Kelly’s current nose and teeth situation don’t match the original set.

Kelly was not amused:
“I’m gonna tell you right now. No nose job, and no veneers. I wouldn’t be sleeping in a retainer every night if I had. You guys do know how to make a girl feel special.”
Mark then chimed in:
“I can attest…same nose. No veneers … and fierce retainer.”
Kelly responded: 
“Thanks honey, I’ll wear it for you tonight.”
I don’t wanna suffer the wrath of Ripa, but she does look a little different in the nose area. And if this makes her mad and she wants to send Mark to my house to, um, “discuss” it, well, I wouldn’t say no to that.
Well, first Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner broke up and he moved into the guesthouse to make the transition easier on the kids. Then Ben met Lindsay Shookus and he moved even further out of the house and seemed to have settled down from gambling drinking Ben.

But this week, Ben is ALLEGEDLY single again—after he and Lindsay stopped following one another on social media … which is the new way of saying you’re single—and he has been spotted with a 22-year-old Playmate and having boxes of booze delivered to his home and so Jennifer Garner stepped in.

Garner ALLEGEDLY staged an intervention with a sober coach at his house because she was concerned about his sobriety and quicker than you can say ‘Affleck’s Batman sucks’ he was whisked off to rehab again.

In fact, after the intervention at his house with the sober coach, the not-quite-ex-couple left together in her car, stopped at Jack in the Box—the go-to fast food for hangovers—before heading to a rehab facility.

Seriously, Garner must be some kind of a saint to keep trying to save Ben from himself.
Hell hath no fury like Nicki Minaj finding her new album opened in the Number 2 pot on the Billboard charts behind Kylie Jenner’s boyfriend and baby father, Travis Scott.

During a Twitter freak out, Nicki raged about rappers, like Travis, manipulating sales by including their albums in bundles:
“But what we’re not gonna do is have this auto-tune man coming up here selling f**king sweaters and telling y’all he sold half a million albums, because he didn’t. And it’s a lot of rappers behind the scene that won’t talk about it and they’re scared. Sweetheart, I’m not scared. I’m legendary in these streets.”
And then Nicki came for Kylie:
“You stupid f**k. You got your f**king homeboy talking for you and you got your girlfriend selling tour passes [to Travis’ shows]. Stop it. Knock it the f**k off.”
And Nicki is furious that Travis was selling passes to his Astroworld tour, given that her own tour is having lackluster sales:
“When [Travis] comes along and sells a tour pass that has nothing to do with his f**king music and says he’s sold more than Kanye West and Nas—no you f**king didn’t, keep it the f**k real. I know I’m that bitch, I know I’m number one.”
As for Nicki’s tour, it seems like tis selling as many tickets as a Kevin Spacey film.
In Keep It Your Pants news … at 57, Eddie Murphy is about to be a father again for the tenth time.

He and girlfriend Paige Butcher are expecting another child as a baby brother or sister for their two-year-old daughter.

Baby #10 will join Izzy Oona, Murphy and Paige’s daughter, Angel Iris, Murphy and Mel B’s daughter, Bria, Myles, Shayne, Zola, and Bella, Murphy and ex-wife Nicole’s children, Christian, Murphy and Tamara Hood Johnson’s son, and Eric , Murphy and Paulette McNeely’s son.

Seriously, Eddie, they sell condoms just about anywhere now.

6 comments:

Helen Lashbrook said...

I would guess that Paige Butcher is another Melanie - a gold digger who thinks that by having her husband or partner's child that will keep the coins pouring in for the keep looking young surgery stuff and all the expensive clothing. People - it ain't going to work! Look at the turnover of females in these old men's lives - steer clear and then you won't have to imagine Mr Right every time you go to bed with the creepy old man - Jerry Hall I'm talkin' to you too.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

I suspect Jennifer Garner wants Ben Affleck sober so he can be a decent father to their kids. Nothing wrong with that.

the dogs' mother said...

Have a good Snarkaday!

Deedles said...

ICK!

anne marie in philly said...

somebody take a knife to eddie murphy!

mark consuelos looks a bit "lighter" too. and that bitch kelly is lying!

the rest of them can drop dead and the world will be better off.

Dave R said...

So, I guess this means fewer shallow people will buy SJP shoes.

It's not Kelli's nose and teeth - she's lost weight and had her eyes and cheeks done.

As for Garner? It's the alimony, she wants an increase.

Nicki Minaj at #2? (Heavy Sigh) who cares.

I thought you knew , the only way for Eddie to get a laugh now a days is to make another baby.