Thursday, April 27, 2017

Random Musings

Ivanka _____ was in Germany this week, attending a women’s summit and getting booed for saying her father, AKA PussyGrabber, empowers women.

At the same time, PussyGrabber, AKA President _____, was hosting UN Ambassadors at the White House and asked those assembled if his pick for Us Ambassador, Nikki Haley, was being nice to them; he then added, “If she isn’t, we’ll get rid of her.”

Ah, that’s empowering.
There was a recent piece of legislation proposed in Maryland called the Rape Survivor Family Protection Act, which would have allowed women who have children as a result of rape to block the rapists’ parental rights.

See, if a woman chooses to raise the child herself, it could mean her rapist would become a part of her life for the next 18 years; or, the rapist could hinder efforts to place the child up for adoption by demanding parental rights.

The panel reportedly ran out of time on the last day of the state’s General Assembly and let the legislation fall by the wayside.  The Assembly isn’t set to reconvene until Jan. 10, 2018. Maryland remains one of seven states without a law that protects women from being forced to share custody with their rapists.

Oh, and before I forget, there was not one single woman on that panel; it was a group of men who let that legislation fall by the wayside.
The first season of Feud ended Sunday and it was fabulouuuuuus! Now, they’re working on Season Two about Princess Diana’s tumultuous marriage. But, because the show is so popular, the third season is in the works and creator Ryan Murphy has said it will be gay-themed.

As if Feud: Bette & Joan wasn’t gay-themed? But I digress ...

Since he’s done female-on-female and male-on-female face-offs, he’s got a male-on-male feud in mind:
“I have one good idea, but I have to get the right actors. It’s something Mark Ruffalo and I had talked about hearing. He’s a buddy of mine from The Normal Heart, so we talked about something, but I don’t know yet. I haven’t locked into it.”
Beyond that, though, his lips are sealed—he won’t begin Season three for another year—so we’ve got time for the details, but ...

Who do you think a gay-themed third season of Feud should involve?
So ... two new shows, two hot men.

Starz has a new bodice-ripper, The White Princess, about King Henry VII and Elizabeth of York. It stars Jacob Collin’s Levy, right, as Henry and, well, I’ll just say, one episode in, Henry has a fine ass.

Also, Showtime has Guerrilla, about the Civil Rights movement in England in the 1970s and it stars perennial Hot Man, Idris Elba—left ... swoon—although he’s wearing an awful haircut in this one; still, he’s Idris Elba.

That’s all.
Shawn Barber, Canadian Olympic pole vault champion, has come out as gay in a Facebook post:
“Gay and proud! Thank you to my parents for being such a great support. I continue to grow as a person and have a great support group. My parents are my greatest support and have helped me through a lot recently. To my friends, you are always my friends and I love you too!”
Of course he’s gay, I said to Carlos, he’s a “pole” vaulter. He's also a hottie.

I apologize for that, and send Shawn, a hottie in his own right, a copy of The Gay Agenda and the Official Coming Out Toaster Oven from HOMO HQ.

Welcome out, Shawn.
President _____ went to Walter Reed National Medical Center last Saturday where he awarded the Purple Heart to Army Sergeant First Class Alvaro Barrientos, saying:
"When I heard about this, I wanted to do it myself. Congratulations … tremendous.”
Congratulations on receiving a medal given to soldiers who were wounded or killed in battle.

I ‘m thinking most soldiers do go into battle hoping to be given a Purple Heart but then Draft Dodging Donald wouldn’t know that.
Erin Moran, Joanie from Happy Days and Joanie Loves Chachi, died this week and while most of her former castmates remembered her fondly, _____ supporter and all-around fuckmonkey, Scott Baio, said this about Moran:
“For me, you do drugs or drink, you’re gonna die. And I’m sorry if that’s cold, but… God gave you a brain, gave you the will to live and thrive, and you gotta take care of yourself.”
Erin Moran died of stage 4 cancer and Scott Baio is a heartless dick.
I was born in Biloxi, Mississippi, but remember nothing about it because we moved to California when I was six months old and I have never been back.

That may change because, this week, Biloxi has made the decision to remove the Mississippi state flag from all city buildings because it bears the Confederate battle as part of its design.

That symbol of hate will no longer fly in Biloxi; good on them.
Embattled homophobic Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore lost his effort to regain his job this week when the Alabama Supreme Court upheld his suspension for urging defiance of that federal ruling regarding same-sex marriage.

Moore, unhinged as ever, lashed out at the ruling, saying he considers his suspension to be both illegal and a "clear disregard of the will of the people who elected me chief justice."

Except that, as a judge, you fuckmonkey, you failed to follow the law.

Moore is said to be considering a run for the Alabama Senate.

Seriously, Alabama? You look bad enough already; don’t make it worse by electing this idiot to any other public office.
So, there’s a new film being shopped around that would chronicle Madonna’s early years—when she was relevant—as a recording artist in New York in the 1980s; Elyse Hollander’s script for Blond Ambition topped the 2016 “Black List,” an annual ranking of the best unproduced screenplays in Hollywood. Michael De Luca, who produced Fifty Shades of Grey, is set to produce but there are no details on who will play Madge.

There are all kinds of details about how Madge feels about the idea though ... she is not happy and took her mood to Instagram:
“Nobody knows what I know and what I have seen. Only I can tell my story. Anyone else who tries is a charlatan and a fool ... Looking for instant gratification without doing the work. This is a disease in our society.”
Funny she says that now, but failed to ever say it about any other film biography.

How long until she describes the film as a kind of rape or an anti-women idea?

Sit down Madge.
Lord, the things people make, the things people buy, and the prices they pay for them.

Apparently Fergie created a pair of holey jeans with a fake piss stain on the crotch and was charging $2,300 a pair for them. Seriously; the “I Pissed Myself” jeans?

But now, another loony entrepreneur, PRPS, is selling a pair of $425 jeans for people who want to look like they’ve been working in the farm all day but don’t want to actually work in the farm all day.

Yes, the jeans are designed to look as though you’ve been working in the mud all day. On the Nordstrom website they’re described like this:
“Heavily distressed medium-blue denim jeans in a comfortable straight-leg fit embody rugged, Americana workwear that’s seen some hard-working action with a crackled, caked-on muddy coating that shows you’re not afraid to get down and dirty.”
Come on down to Smallville; I’m headed to Goodwill to stock up on old jeans that I’m going throw in a mud puddle out back and sell for $300 a pair.

Or, a better idea, I’ll just head to the local high school and shove kids in the dirt and mud and charge them a hundred bucks for my Fashion Advice.

Until I get arrested ...


the dogs' mother said...

When we lived on the West Side we did all our shopping at Nordstroms. Now I would not be able to stop laughing to go into the store.

anne marie in philly said...

liberace & scott thorson!

I'mma diggin' that tweet!

and moore, baio, ivankatakadump, madonna, the dump, the MD assembly (notice all white males except 2) need to siddown and shaddap!

itsmyhusbandandme said...

My blue jeans are clean. I wonder what that says about me?

Anonymous said...

Great musings today, Bob. I'm going to concentrate on the jeans because GAH! Buying these things proves that you actually are afraid of getting down and dirty. Four hundred dollars worth of fear in fact. These are the kind of mental giants that bought pet rocks, only they lack a certain whimsy. Again, GAH!


Debra She Who Seeks said...

We loved watching Feud! Great series. For a gay-themed feud, I'd suggest the Marquis of Queensbury and Oscar Wilde. A fierce and tragic feud that ended in Wilde's disgrace and downfall.

Bob Slatten said...

I LOVE that idea1

mistress maddie said...

This is the first Random Musings that ever opens with two twats! Ivanka is getting into a huge wale up call, when she sees how hate that name and her family is.

As for Feud, I too loved it,but probably won't watch the second season. I can't stand Prince Charles...never could. He now is like Dumbo married to a old hag who looks like Mister Ed. And I don't know I'd call their history as a Feud. I say let's skip it, and go for Debs' idea.

Professor Chaos said...

Didn't Madonna want to do a biopic about Frida Kahlo? And didn't she play Eva Peron in Evita? But only she can do a movie about herself. Ugh, go back to England and work on your fake accent.

Helen Lashbrook said...

I'm with MM on PC and his Horse Loving duchess - wathc this for a laugh -

Theresa Young said...

I have one pair of jeans in my closet that don't have stains. I save those for special occasions. Every other pair looks like I've been rolling in mud. Hey, I'm in style and didn't even know it!