Monday, January 07, 2019

The Golden Globes ... A World Of Fashion, Good, Bad, and Elisabeth Moss

BEST
NICOLE KIDMAN … sometimes Nicki tends to embellish in her choices, but when she goes sleek, she goes to the top of the list, along with …

REGINA KING … stunning in a rose-colored sequined dress. It doesn’t hurt that she’s one of my favorite actresses …and a winner last night, baby …she also has fire and passion in her professional and her sense of style.
GOOD
Top Row
Danai Gurira …from Black Panther … set fire to the carpet, but in a good way.

Julia Roberts looks fun and casual and yet still elegant.

Emily Blunt is not your father’s Poppins in this sexy little number.

Keri Russell showing how glitter and cleavage can be done without looking tacky.

Penelope Cruz also tends to go overboard—Carlos often dubs her a pinata—but this is actually understated, and I like it.

Bottom Row
Saoirse Ronan brought some Art Deco slink, though the clunky shoes are a misstep … see what I did there, misstep? I’ll stop.

Julianne Moore in a sedate, kind of virginal number, but since she can also go wacky in style and color, she gets props for this.

Olivia Colman … I love that the glittery top part of the dress comes down the sleeves. I also love that she won and was truly giddy about it, and that she caked Emma Stone and Rachel Weisz her “bitches.”

 Sandra Oh …as in Oh can she bring the eleganza.

Thandie Newton trotted out Disco Diana Ross and for that I love her.
MEH
Top Row
Amber Heard looked like she was going to prom … in 1991. I tried to find a photo of her Bride of Frankenstein hair from the side, but the internet was scrubbed of that image.

Amy Adams. C’mon, Amy, you were a double nominee last night and you pulled this boring design and color out to wear? Try, girl, try.

 Emma Stone usually looks fun and young and hip, but last night she was downright matronly in her grandma’s party dress.

Glenn Close. I get it, she’s royalty, but why a cape? And why wear the cape all night?

Bottom Row
Anne Hathaway  came roaring back …. See what I did there? Roaring? Leopard print? I’ll stop, though I couldn’t help but think she was giving me Cruella DeVil.

Claire Foy is a gorgeous woman, and that’s coming from a gay man, but this dress, with those tacky sequined stars, is just awful.

Lucy Liu. A gorgeous dress, a different dress, covering up by voluminous drapery sheers. No, Lucy. No!

Taraji P. Henson. Taraji? Girl? Please take note of Keri Russell is you want to continue your trend of deeply low-cut, wide-cut dresses. One of these days there will be spillage …


Lady Gaga. We get it. You’re a movie star now but leave some fabric in the store …save the yards and yards of train for a wedding gown … and never have your hair match the gown … or the carpet match the drapes.
BAD
Clockwise
Catherine Zeta Jones in a dress as tight and stiff as her face and smile. Seriously, CZJ, enough with the Botox.

Laura Dern in what can best be described as Grandma’s Frilly See-Through Dress. And not in a good way.

Melissa McCarthy is wearing some kinda home-made craft project. I mean, seriously, how else can you explain the stars? McCall’s called; they say you ruined their pattern.

Jodie Comer was the hot stylish assassin in Killing Eve and so she opted to show up in some kinda cheerleader pom-pom, frou-frou looking mess? I expected more, but this is killing me.
WORST
Debra Messing. Sequins? Check. Feathers? Check? Cape? Check? Too much? Oh, hell yes. You aren’t getting an OBE; in fact, you didn’t even get a Globe.


Janelle Monae. I love her. But doesn’t she look like a robot from some sort of gender fluid reboot of the Tin Man? It’s as if she couldn’t choose one look, so she wore them all.


Elisabeth Moss looks like a last call girl, or a last call-girl, at one of those sleazy bars about eight blocks off the strip in Vegas.
MEN
FABULOUS MAN
Billy Porter, from Pose, rocking, and I mean rock-king, a cape. Glenn Close should take notes!
ANDROGYNOUS MAN
Cody Fern, the Son of Satan from American Horror Story, in a sheer-topped shirt. And he worked it.
HOT TALL MAN
John Krasinski in royal blue and a beard. I could climb that any day of the week. Plus, he and his wife, Emily Blunt, are adorable together.
HOT MAN IN A LIGHT SUIT
John David Washington, Paulette’s son, knows how a man should do a light-colored suit, and someone further down the list should have paid attention.
HOT MAN IN A HARNESS
Timothee Chalamet is giving me heat, in all the right places. I do love  a man in a harness, especially a glittery one.
MEN IN COUPLINGS
Bradley Cooper looks like she should be dishing ice cream in that ridiculous looking suit. Take a look up there at JDW and see how that look should be done. His date, Irina Shayk, looks like a Cher knock-off and she should knock it off.

Idris Elba. Good lord, take me now. No, seriously, take me … now. He wore green and looked like a million bucks, plus his fiancée, Sabrina Dhowre, also looked fun and flirty, though I need her to step out of camera rag because she’s ruining my fantasy.
A FEW GOOD MEN
Mahershala Ali in royal blue. He also rocked a scarf, though not the same kinda tired white scarf Jon Voight always wears. He was hot.

Rami Malek is an odd-looking man, and a bit on the wee side, but there’s something about him that I just can’t put my finger on, though not for lack of trying. Plus, I loved his passionate acceptance speech.

Stephan James, a new face, a hot face, a totally adorable face, in velvet no less.
BEST MAN
Michael B.—as in, Won’t-You-B-My-Husband-In-My-Head—Jordan. He is simply fine, head-to-toe, side-to-side, front-to-back. I’d seriously clear a shelf for him in my collection.

9 comments:

Alan Scott said...

Idris Elba and John Krasinski! *drool!*

mistress maddie said...

I dont watch...you know, my attention span. Nicole Kidman is hands down the best dressed in hollywood, almost consistently I adore her.

the dogs' mother said...

I always look forward to your fashion
reports! Excellent and funny as always.
xoxoxox

Mark in DE said...

What an unfortunate suit choice for Bradley Cooper, who is undoubtedly and unequivocably the most beautiful man on the planet.

Leanna said...

I often wonder if Carlos is celibate or does he go on about other guys with the "husband in my head" routine like you do. It's just a funny thought.

Sixpence Notthewiser said...

Chalamet and Billy Porter game life. I LoLd @ Elisabeth Moss ‘last call girl’. Dead, I’m telling you. And I like Michael Jordan semi nude, thank you.

Bob Slatten said...

@Leanna
Carlos knows I may have a husband-in-my-head or twenty, but he's the only man for me.

@Sixpence Notthewiser
Yass.
And thank you.
And yasssssss.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Lady Gaga's dress was actually quite subdued for her. I think she's attempting to go mainstream.

Debbie said...

Hey Bob! Here is my response to your response to my blog:

As always, spit out my coffee here:

Bradley Cooper and Irina Shayk. Seriously? He looks like he’d be selling ice cream and blow jobs on a side street, and she’s a Budget Cher from the 70s.

Alex Borstein; it’s a’ight. Doesn’t say awards show though. Says dinner at Red Lobster.
(I actually agree -- not really appropriate for an awards show) - but you made me laugh!

Maya Rudolph. I loathe ruffles…on anyone except a potato chip and a pirate.

I’ll give you Viggo, if you give me Mahershala? ABSOLUTELY!

Hope you guys are doing well!
XOXOXOXOX
Deb