PR 10 EP 14: Finally! The Finale!

So, they get some feedback last week—Start over! Wow us! Cut off those cuffs!!—and the designtestants do just that—with an extra bankroll and a trip to Mood. That was the first thing that pissed me off; that whole “second chance” business. I mean, were they not given nine-thousand-dollars to create ten looks? And did they not know that on the PR you need to Wow The Judges AKA Don’t Bore Nina?

So, why a second chance? It smacks of trying to force a winner, and for a moment, I thought it would be to give Christopher a second chance most of all. After all, he did get the "I’m-in-a-panic" edit, with the "I’ll-never-finish" montage and the "I-deserve-to-win-because-I’ve-won-four-challenges" sob.

If I said it once to Carlos, I said it every time Christopher opened his mouth: I loathe that bitch. Maybe Gunnar was right?????

Let’s rip…..

CHRISTOPHER

At the beginning I was kinda Team Christopher, but, when he showed us the same shredded “signature” dress, I was over. I mean, Ven got dogged out for being Mama Origami Rose, but Christopher got all kinds of props for being, um, “innovative.” Huh?

And in this episode, he gets to play all scattered and whiny and Look at me! I work so hard—because, in his mind, none of the other designers works hard. In between the rubbing of the eyes, and telling us he wants to throw up, and wearing that damned x-ray fabric scarf, he gets the weepies. I was sure he was going to win, because the edit made it look as though he wouldn’t finish.

But he took that extra three-hundred bucks and went to Mood and pranced and danced around and moaned about how, standing in a sea of fabrics, Mood doesn’t have anything! Apparently they did, though, because in the space of about 24 minutes of TV time, Christopher has changed his collection. 

Gone are the stupid shorts and T’s, and there is far less x-ray fashion. But there are leather waist pieces—I was annoyed how he snapped at guest judge Jennifer Hudson when she called it a leather skirt: “It’s a leather belt!!”—and brocade pants.

It was a Meh for me.

The sit on the first look: too high. And the sheer, bralessness of it? No. No. His collections had been in browns and blacks, and then suddenly there was blue and magenta brocade pants and belts and jackets that don’t close and t-shirts and shorts and, wait, is that a ball gown? How the hell did a ball gown get in here?

Seriously, his collection should have been called Everything But The Kitchen Sink, because that’s what it was. Seriously, there was a kitchen sink dress but just before runway the zipper broke. I kid. Or do I?

Kors said the first look started the show with that much needed Wow moment, and he loved the distressed leather and the fact that Christopher created his own print. He also said Christopher was all over the place and that it was just too much [i.e. kitchen sink]. Jennifer Hudson, while she liked the leather pieces felt the collection had no consistency, you know, x-rays, brocades, leathers, wools, ball gowns, mish, and mash.

Heidi liked some of the pieces—like the one-shoulder x-ray dress—but also dinged him for too much stuff, while Nina thinks he pushed himself towards the hard edge and away from the softness he showed all season.

Christopher gets Auf’d first because his collection was too much of a hodge-podge of last minute ideas. He should have stuck to his vision and just streamlined it rather than bulking it up. And, so, while he spent all season saying he was the one who should win because he worked the hardest and needed the most, as a loser, he said, Oh I really don’t care.

I didn’t buy that and, apparently, neither did his boyfriend, who thankfully removed that god-awful x-ray scarf before Christopher could Auf himself.

He saved Chrsitopher's life, and possibly saved the world from the dreaded Gay Man In Giant Scarf phenom.

MELISSA

I liked her because she first appeared to be Designer Barbie, but really was more Leather Barbie Who Kicks Ass. California girl with tattoos. Plus she has a very distinct style, and her collection looked like clothes she would actually wear.

But she tends to get stuck in black-and-white, or sometimes just black. So when Nina cursed her out last week for her lack of color, and overabundance of “cuffage”, Melissa took it to heart, and used her three-hundred Mood bucks to buy Blood Orange Red Leather. 

Christopher—apparently knowing he was out of his element and on the way to a fourth place finish—gave us an eye roil and said, "Blood orange? She’s so pretentious. Shut up, it’s f***ing red." Well, at least it wasn’t a Red Blood Cell Christopher because then you’d have said she was copying you.

So, red became a running theme throughout the collection and did tie it together, somewhat. She ended up with just one red dress, several red pocketbooks, and some red trim, strewn amongst the black and white.

But the Blood Orange leather dress was amazing and made even more so when you realized she created it in about a half a day. When the showstopper is the last piece made, and made by the minute, and looks so good, it says a lot about the designer, her style and her ability.

Except when it came to the long white dress that was so tight the model could barely walk. Melissa kept blaming it on the shoes and I kept screaming, Put a slit in it! Maker it sexy! Make the model walk!

Apparently Melissa couldn’t hear me, although my neighbors did file a noise complaint. Note to Melissa: No one! No one wants a dress that doesn’t allow them to take anything but baby steps.

Still, removing the pirate cuffs from that one jacket made it seem modern and less costume-y, so, props for that. I wasn’t a fan of the leather, or is it pleather, bathing suit. In a sea—see what I did there? Bathing suit? Sea? Okay, I’ll stop—of dresses and pants, a bathing suit seemed out of place; especially in leather. But she also restyled the white booty shorts, with the backwards top and bra look from last week, by adding a short jacket with a cool red leather detail. That was a smart choice.

Still, the Blood Orange leather dress was fantastic. I wished there had been more of that sexy, tough girl vibe. Kors said that, as the only girl Melissa was the only one who really understood women; he also praised her for losing the pirate cuff, though knocked her down a peg for the Unwalkable Dress: “I wanted to nail her shoes to a skateboard and have someone pull her down the runway!”

But newly thin Jennifer Hudson liked the Unwalkable Dress, if only it was tighter at the waist. She also liked that Melissa’s clothes are young and funky, and perfect for what most young girls want. Heidi loved the strong, tough chick vibe, and even the bathing suit, while Nina loved the red—always listen to Nina—and the cool sexy, but not slutty look, to Melissa’s clothes.

Melissa was next to go. Her collection had the opposite problem of Christopher’s, in that it was kinda one-note, or “one trick monkey” as Dmitry might say. It was cool and chic, but needed to be pulled together.

FABIO

I wasn’t a Fabio fan to begin with, because of that whole dumpster-food-0diving stuff, but he really grew on me this season. Partly because of his own very quirky, very cool style—my favorite moment was the challenge he won when Kors said, “It took a man in a dress to get a girl in a dress.”

Fabio marches to his own beat in everything, from his own style to his clothing and, on top of it all, he’s just plain nice. When the critique didn’t go his way, he always said Thanks. And he always gave a smile, and he always took the judges words to heart and make improvements.

Like when Nina told him last week that his collection didn’t look luxe and rich. Fabio reworked it, and added the organza that Tim had suggested weeks and weeks ago, and really made his collection better.

And different, His was the only one that wasn’t black and dark; by contrast, his was all lightness and floating and beautiful colors.

Fabio's final collection was "Cosmic Tribalism", which, at first sounded pretentious, but when you see it, the name totally fit. It was all soft and drape-y and layered, and very easy and cool. It had a lot going on but didn’t seem overworked.

Plus he added the great striped shorts and tops in the last two days that really made his looks rich and expensive…like Nina commanded!

His use of spraying watercolor on the fabrics was very cool, and very elegant, especially on that really simple dress. And I’m glad he kept the clunky shoes because it added a little bit if a hard edge to his soft clothes. And his layering was amazing; he took a small top, put a long open sweater over in, put pants on the model and then added a long skirt that was knotted and draped and it didn’t look the least bit heavy.

Heidi “loveloveloved” it for its lightness and ethereal vibe, and the fact that it was utterly Fabio. She said everything in it was good. Nina gave him props for listening to her and making it more sophisticated and cool, and mostly loved the “otherness” of Fabio’s personal style that he was able to translate to the runway. Kors loved that he went pastels and not black, and loved how Fabio draped his clothes; he also said Fabio seems to posses that way of knowing what people want before they actually want it, which makes for a great designer. JHud said he “owned” his collection, and she loved all the layering.

And there I was, rooting for Fabio. I thought he deserved the win because he was new and exciting. His main problem, in the eyes of the judges, was that his collection is more conceptual and not “right now” though I loved what Jennifer Hudson said, though, about how Dmitry didn’t really “need” PR to make it, but maybe if Fabio won, it would give him the push that would allow his clothes to be seen and sold and therefore make people want them.

Alas, Fabio came in second, though, as always, was utterly gracious. And, since he's so gracious, if you're out there Fabio, and reading this, I'd love to see your style done up as some menswear stuff. I could really rock the Smallville Fashion Scene in head-to-toe Fabio-lousness!

DMITRY

He was kinda the Tortoise of Tortoise and the Hare fame this season, Slow and steady. 

Wins the race.

He just put his head down, and—except for his run-ins with Elena—just made it work. His dresses and sleek, and slinky and sexy, and really well-made. I can’t think of too many things he did this season that looked sloppy or half-finished.

And, well, Shallow Alert: why was he hiding his ass all season? I mean, wearing those jeans in the workroom, I DVR’d back to check out what I thought was an illusion of a really great butt, and it wasn’t! And then on the final runway he wore leather pants! Oh Dmitry, you should’a been wearing tight jeans, or leather, all season….but I digress.

Dmitry's collection—inspired by organic architecture…whatever that means—was the most cohesive, but I got an Alexis Carrington Colby, mid-80s feel from it. I mean, maybe retro 80s is in, I don’t know, but I kept imaging Joan Collins being thrown into a fish pond in several of his looks.

And some, while very cool, did border on costume. The dress with the fringe—yes, it was beautiful and well-made—but looked like something from a TV show, and that gown, with the fringe and the sequins and the, well, whatever else it was, seemed Broadway revival of Anything Goes.

His jacket with the fringe-y arms? I like it, but I don’t like how it was shown. With baggy pants on the runway it made the model look like the Hulk with giant forearms and thighs; I kept waiting for her to get mad and go all green on Michael Korange.

But his other dresses were sleek and contemporary and the silvery shimmery number was cool, though right on the outskirts of Costume Town.

Jennifer Hudson said Dmitry's clothes are strong, they are "now," and he is ready, while Heidi thought he put on a beautiful show. His clothes are modern and sleek and cool, and she loved the fringe-y dress. 

Kors said his collection was impeccably tailored, and very expensive looking, though the gown was treading awfully close to costume, and that Dmitry didn’t need all the flash.

This time, when paired with the MC Hammer baggy pants, Nina loved the fringe jacket, and, well, I disagreed completely. That said, I may go into hiding until next season rolls around and Nina forgives me.

So, unfortunately, the judges went the other way and gave it to Dmitry. 

And, to be fair, he did deserve it—not just for that tight leather ass—because he makes really beautiful clothes for women. I do hope he follows Kor's advice and reins in some of the fringe and sparkle and sticks with sleek and sexy.

Congrats, Dmitry!

MY TAKE

I liked this season. The designers were, for the most part—Kooan and Buffi—extremely talented and strong. But, well, this is reality TV and I missed the bitchiness of a Josh or an Ivy or the snootiness of a Gretchen. We had no real villains this time out, and every show, real or not, needs a villain.

I kind of agree with the winner, though my heart belongs to Fabio’s sense of style. But there was one sense of style that had me shaking my head: Heidi.

What was with that low low low cut dress? I mean it looked hot and sexy while standing, but when she sat down it looked like her boobies were resting in her lap.

I was kinda hoping they'd make Heidi run the catwalk and then critique her looks, not as a designer, but as a Big Fashion No.

Anyhoooo, there we have it: PR 10, done and gone.

What did YOU think?

And are you ready for some All-stars?