I Didn't Say It ...

Nancy Pelosi, paying tribute to John Lewis, the “conscience of the U.S. Senate.” as he lies in state at the Capitol:

“When he made his speech [at the March on Washington] 57 years ago, he was the youngest speaker. How fitting it is that in the final days of his life, he summoned the strength to acknowledge the young people peacefully protesting in the same spirit of that march, taking up the unfinished work of racial justice. Helping complete the journey begun more than 55 years ago.”

The best thing we can do to honor and remember Lewis is to stand up, speak up and vote.

photo

Louie Gohmert, the GOP loon and anti-masker from Texas, blaming his positive test for Covid-19 on wearing a mask:

“It’s really ironic because a lot of people have made a big deal out of my not wearing a mask a whole lot but in the last week or two I have worn a mask more than I have the whole last four months. … I can’t help but wonder if by keeping a mask on and keeping it in place, if I might have put some germs… some of the virus on the mask and breathed it in… But the reports of my demise are very premature.”

Stupid, stupid man you have representing you Texas.

photo

Anthony Fauci, the nation’s top infectious diseases expert, on _____’s assertion that he had mislead Americans about Covid-19:

“I don’t know how to address that. I’m just going to certainly continue doing my job. I don’t tweet. I don’t even read them, so I don’t really want to go there. I just will continue to do my job no matter what comes out because I think it’s very important. We’re in the middle of a crisis with regard to a pandemic. This is what I do, this is what I’ve been trained for all my professional life and I’ll continue to do it…I have not been misleading the American public under any circumstances.”

Gosh, who to believe? The medical expert, the college educated doctor, or the fuckwit who believes in Demon Sperm and drinking bleach?

photo

Anderson Cooper, CNN, taking _____ to task for defending a Houston doctor/minister who touts hydroxychloroquine as a “cure” for Covid-19 and how witches and demons use astral projection to have intercourse with humans from afar:

“Once again, today, he did have plenty to say about this woman who he has praised for her public embrace of hydroxychloroquine. She is a doctor who also preaches about alien DNA and the sperm of demons … [and] … she’s part of a group of doctors talking about unproven and… potentially dangerous Covid treatments. He would not or could not face questioning the support of this person he knows nothing about and today he made no mention of demon sex but like a man possessed, he was still praising her. ‘I’m impressed with her; he says, ‘I know nothing about her’ he says. It been 24 hours and if the president did want to know something about this person that he is now promoting on a global stage, he’s had plenty of time to Google her or have someone else do it and tell him about her and the demon sex and astral sex. Hard to imagine this president’s ears wouldn’t perk up with those topics. Clearly, what doesn’t interest him is medical studies and the action of the FDA removing authorization of the drugs she’s touting. What clearly doesn’t interest the president is scientists and guidelines on social distancing or wearing masks. Things that actually can save lives.”

Our new death rate is One American Per Minute thanks to the continuing ineptitude of the man who said he alone can fix anything.

So much winning.

photo

Madonna, on the Demon Semen Doctor:

“The Truth will set us all Free! But some people dont [sic] want to hear the truth. Especially the people in power who stand to make money from this long drawn out search for a vaccine. Which has been proven and has been available for months. They would rather let fear control them and let the rich get richer and the poor and sick get sicker. This woman is my hero. Thank you Stella Immanuel.”

Gurl, stick to what I would loosely call singing. Or, maybe just go back to taking semi-nude photos in your tub. Or is it that Demon Semen Doc is the one who's been doing all your recent plastic surgery?

Seriously.

photo

Seth Meyers, Later Night host, with his own take on Dr. Demon Sperm:

“As the coronavirus pandemic has spread out of control, so has misinformation about it. If you have Facebook, or an uncle who still wears his class ring, you’ve probably heard some of it. [But] believe me, we all wish hydroxychloroquine actually worked. Everyone wishes there was a cure for coronavirus. No one wants to be trapped inside for this long …[But] demon sperm sounds like a catchphrase on Church Chat After Dark. Seriously, who on Earth could possibly trust a doctor like this? _____ won’t listen to the renowned infectious disease expert who actually works for him, but he loves the demon sperm lady.” 

Perhaps had he taken his own SATs and failed miserably and never got into college and became the fat orange blob that works a loading dock at a big box store and spends the weekend getting drunk and choking his mushroom shaped chicken to high school pictures of his hooker daughter Ivanka, we wouldn’t be in this mess.

So, naturally, I’m’a blame the guy who took the test for _____.

photo