Texas Governor, Miss Ricky Perry, Signs 'Merry Christmas' Bill Into Law

Down there in Texas, sitting amongst a bevy of sleigh bell-ringing Santa Claus impersonators, Governor, and Not Gay, Rick Perry signed a law that protects Christmas and other holiday celebrations in Texas public schools from legal challenges — but also stressed that freedom of religion is not the same thing as freedom from religion.

But it is, Blanche, but it is, if my religion is no religion.

This was all a show put on by Miss Ricky to shore up her Christian conservative credentials before traveling to Washington for the Faith & Freedom Coalition's "Road to Majority" conference with fellow wingnuts, dingbats, asshats, and hypocrites, Marco Rubio, Rand Paul and fellow Texan Ted Cruz.

Perry’s new legislation, which he calls the "Merry Christmas bill," was a bipartisan measure that sailed through the state House and Senate to reach Perry's desk; bipartisan in Texas doesn’t translate into bipartisanship for the rest of the country where we understand the meaning of Separation of Church and State.

His bill will remove legal risks of saying "Merry Christmas" in schools while also protecting traditional holiday symbols, like the menorah or the nativity scene, as long as more than one religion and a secular symbol are also reflected.

"I realize it's only June. But it's a good June and the holidays are coming early this year. It's a shame that a bill like this one I'm signing today is even required, but I'm glad that we're standing up for religious freedom in this state. Religious freedom does not mean freedom from religion."—Miss Ricky Perry

Miss Ricky’s press conference, and his apparent love of jolly bears with white beards in his offices, might have been spurred on by the fact that during the last Sunday of the Texas legislative session, Representative Donna Howard, a Democrat, offered the Texas House this prayer:

"We are fortunate to live in a country where we have the freedom to exercise the religion of our choosing while also being free from having any religion imposed upon us."

As she finished, many of her Conservative religious zealot colleagues held their own prayer session.

Miss Perry did not mention Donna Howard or her prayer, but he did invite cheerleaders from Kountze High School in East Texas to the signing ceremony; they were briefly barred by their school district from displaying banners with bible verses at football games.  Miss Perry, while signing the bill and ogling those jiggly bearded men’s bellies and nether regions, says his new law was for believers such as the Kountze cheerleaders, who wore red "I cheer for Christ" T-shirts.

And the bill's sponsor, Republican, of course, Reprehensible, er Representative Dwayne Bohac says he drafted it after discovering that his son's school erected a "holiday tree" last December because any mention of Christmas could spark litigation.

"We hope that this is a fire that will take off and become laws in the other 49 states."—Dwayne Bohac

I hope people in the other 49 get fired up and remind the state of Texas and wingnut dingbat asshats like Perry and Bohac that not everyone is Christian, and that not every one believes in God, and that everyone is represented by his “Merry Christmas bill.”

But then Rick Perry cares not a whit for people who don’t think like he does; you know, people whose brains fire on all cylinders.

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