Shooting GOP Fish In A Barrel

While I know it isn’t the smartest thing in the world to be doing, I often get into, um, discussions, er, arguments, er, debates, with my staunchly Republican boss about politics.

It usually goes like this:

Bob: Did you hear what that moron John Boehner said today?

Boss: Obama says stupid things, too.

Bob: I’m sure he has, and will, but that’s not the conversation. Did you hear what Boehner—?

Boss: Blah blah blah Democrats blah blah liberal blah blah Obama blah.

As you can tell by my blatant use of the ‘blah’ I generally stop listening when my boss goes off on one of his tangents. But I often wonder, does he really know what he’s standing up for? Does he even think about the GOP and what they actually mean? And, if so, can he do so without laughing?

Let’s take a look at some things the GOP likes to talk about:

For one, their obsession with Ronald Reagan. I mean, they gotta reach back to the early 1980s to find ‘their’ best candidate? And when they call him the “true conservative” I just about giggle my pants wet because they can’t name one single conservative thing Ronnie did.

He quadrupled our national debt—which isn’t very conservative—and is something Republicans don’t deny, but they still trumpet him as the best of “Republican conservatism.” But, the Bush’s, HW and W, also increased our national debt, but you don’t hear the GOP bragging about those two. What gives?

And what about this recession thingy that the GOP blamed on Obama even though it started when he was still Candidate Obama and W was the decider-er, or something? And the ones that don’t blame Obama still rant that he made the recession worse, clearly forgetting that he cut job losses by 50% just four months into his term.

But, you know, if the GOP were to admit that Obama did anything right regarding the economy, well, then he would have been assured re-election which, um, yeah, he was, Mittsy. So, when the GOP Goosesteppers admitted that things were improving and that they were happy about it, well, wouldn’t that have been a lie? Yeah.

And do not get me started on the Birther Movement. The GOP begged and pleaded, then demanded that Obama prove he was a Real Amurican, and forced him to release not one, but two different forms of his birth certificate. And then Donald Rump, running for president … a thought that still makes me howl with glee … also asked for his college transcripts and yet the GOP saw no problem with the fact that their own Man For The White House, Mittsy Romney, refused to show more than 2 years of tax returns.

What’s good for the goose should be good for the goosestepper.

And when Obama began asking about Mittsy’s tax papers, the GOP went all nuts on him, even though during the primary, his lack of tax transparency was an issue every single GOP candidate for the White House raised nearly every chance they got.

And let’s talk dogs. ‘Memba when the story came out about Mittsy tying the family dog to the roof of his luxury car for a road trip? Well, not to be outdone, the GOP began talking about how Obama actually ate dog. Yes, the GOP, for whom the phrase Pot.Kettle.Black. seems to have been invented, compared the mind of a grown-ass man, strapping a pet onto the roof of a moving car to a young boy, a child, eating what his parents told him to eat in a foreign country.

And then god forbid, you bring up Mittsy’s 47-percent remarks, or his bullying of an allegedly gay student by holding him down and forcibly cutting off his hair, or the idea that he changed his mind on nearly every single position he ever held just to win an election, and the GOP comes back with the time Obama said there were 57 states when he meant to say he’d visited 47 of the 50 states.

Now for the capper. The night Obama won. Again. ‘Memba how Karl Rove, GOP Hound of Hell, sat there on FoxNews and refused to say the words ‘Obama Wins’? How he got up outta his chair and ran through the halls of the news station looking for the fool that dared declare Obama won?

I mean, if the GOP was a comedy show you’d call them unbelievable.

So, lets’ end with our discussion of “What planet are you from, GOP?” with a look at Benghazi. The GOP rode the Benghazi Train for months before the election, hoping to get ‘something’ on Obama, and when they couldn’t, they turned their beady eyed glare to Hillary Clinton, trying to ruin her as-yet-unannounced-but-hoped-for bid for the White House in 2016.

Was there a conspiracy regarding Benghazi? Maybe; maybe not. But we do know that there was a conspiracy over who edited the ‘leaked’ emails and the growing GOP rant that Benghazi is worse than 9/11 and the cover-up as bad as Watergate.

So, again, I wonder, why do I argue debate discuss politics with my boss.

It’s like shooting fish in a barrel.

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