So, earlier this Week, ISBL reader, Biki, was given the Outstanding Guest Comment of the Week award, for her response to David Testo's coming out. She put it so sweetly, "With each famous person coming out, it leaves more and more LGBT kids with a smile on their face, instead of fear."
I've been thinking about that this week, and how, when each one of us comes out, as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, we erase the fear on the faces and minds of those who are still closeted, and we make it easier for them to take that step.
But the world doesn't know me, or Biki, or a great many of you, so it's a huge leap forward when famous folks step out and come out and live out. Just this week, The Advocate listed a notable handful of folks who, by coming out as lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender in 2011, have helped push visibility in their worlds. Here's their list, with a couple of mine:
Akil Patterson
Former Division 1 football player came out as a gay man:"As I make this call, this challenge, as you will, to stand for something I ask that you become the change you are looking for. I ask that you show your face, that you speak with a voice and that you of all people let the world know that you aren’t different, you are equal in every way and that you are the change that this world has needed for so long. Be the change, Make the call and stand for who you are as others can only fight so long for you before you are to fight for yourself! Remember, 'Nothing changes, if nothing changes'”
Actress, who came out as a bisexual:
""I think when I became aware of my role in the media, I had to ask myself an important question, 'Am I part of the problem?...I think that the injustice of people staying in the closet is more than I can bear with a clear conscience. and I couldn't sleep at night if I was a part of that problem, if I was part of the lies."
Actress, and author of I'm Walking As Straight as I Can, who came out as a lesbian:
“I wrote it to tell my truth and a part of my truth is being gay. If I didn’t tell that part of who I am, it would be like writing an autobiography and not saying I have cerebral palsy.”
American soccer player, who is now openly gay:
"It's made me realize that life is so much greater than just soccer and winning and losing. It's about the relationships you build with the people around you. In the end, when you're laying down on your death bed, it's not about how much money you’ve made, how many wins you have, any of that. You want to know those connections you had to people and the difference you made in people's lives...And I actually thank being gay for that. Because, hypothetically speaking, I don't know who I would be if I wasn't, but I know this has pushed me to grow in such a way I never would have dreamed."
ESPN reporter, coming out:
"Life is really good right now. I don't have to hide any more."
Politician, who came out publicly to show young LGBTQ people that it does get better:
"It sickens me that young people would think about taking their lives because of who they are."
Figure skater, who has now publicly come out:
"With people killing themselves and being scared into the closet, I hope that even just one person can gain strength from my story."
Satirist, who came out when someone mistook his humor as homophobic:
"I'm not singing I'm gay and proud. I'm saying I'm gay and I don't give a s**t and neither should anyone else."
Journalist, coming out as a gay man:“I'm just more comfortable with myself now. It's taken me until I'm 42 to begin feel this way.”
Member of Maryland's House of Delegates, publicly coming out:
“I have never denied [being gay]. I just presumed people knew.”
Airman who came out to his mother on YouTube:
"I just want to know if you still love and are still proud of me to be your son. That's all I want--I can't expect anything else."
Phillips's mother answers, "I do love you--I'll always love you. I always have loved you. There's nothing that will stop my love for you."
Rugby player, announcing that he is a gay man:
"A massive weight came off my shoulders. If I couldn't accept myself the way I am, how could I expect my friends to?"
NBA executive and gay man:
“It’s been overwhelmingly positive from my team, our players, our ownership, our employees....It’s been humbling, it’s been a little bit overwhelming, but in a very good way. I think for me the challenge is kind of where from here, what do I do with this. I can’t tell you I have the answer to that.”
Australian ex-hockey star, coming out:
"[W]hen you're 25 and you're afraid and you're lonely, and you don't have anyone to talk to, and you feel like there's no escape from that....then it's not something that I'm proud of, but for a long time, there would barely be a week that would go by when I didn't contemplate taking my own life."
Professional bowler, and now openly gay:
"I am very proud and happy with who I am and who I have become as a person, and I would hope that this will empower other gay athletes--past, present, or future–-to come to terms with the truth about who they are and love themselves for who they are."
Actor, father, partner, and out gay man:
"Creatively, I feel so much more open and free...All of the relationships that I have off-camera, I never would have allowed five years ago. It feels so liberating."
ABC World News Now anchor, coming out because Zachary Quinto came out:
"Kind of a big moment for me while filming on WWN...Yunji de Nies and I were talking about celebrity headlines, when i read a story about Zachary Quinto coming out as gay in a magazine interview. Because WWN is a show where you can offer some personality, I had a little fun with the story saying that i would drop my rule against dating actors. I've never shared that I'm gay on-air, even though I've been out to my family, friends and co-workers for years. In fact, an old boyfriend--now best friend--has always given me a hard time about not doing so. But for the same reason that Zach came out, I too, no longer wanted to hide this part of my life. There have been too many tragic endings and too many cases of bullying because of intolerance. As a kid, I wanted someone to look up to, someone that could relate to the feelings I was having. Most of all, I wanted to know that it would get better. And it did. As a journalist, I don't want to be the story, but as a gay man I don't want to stand silent if I can offer some inspiration or encouragement to the kids that might be struggling with who they are."
English cricket player, coming out as gay:
“It’s something I’ve lived with for a long time. Although I feel it is the right time, I am nervous about coming out. Who wouldn’t be?...If I am brutally honest, I never enjoyed touring because of my secret and having to conceal my sexuality. My friendships with the guys would reach a certain level, then I’d have to take a step back...A two-week tour would feel like two years for me. It was really tough. Cricket was my escape. When I was playing cricket I was at my happiest because all I had to worry about was getting runs and taking the catches. It was a relief to be out in the middle.”
Former college basketball player, and now openly gay:
"I'm trying to have a voice, and I want that voice to reach as many people as it can. I mean, look at me. I'm black. I'm gay. I'm like a quadruple minority, and I feel like a little piece of me resides in everybody. Maybe there's a kid out there who doesn't think he's OK, and he can look at me and say, 'OK, he played college basketball. He went overseas. He has a music career and now he's living his life. Now he's who he wants to be and he's happy and confident and comfortable.' It's my responsibility to talk about that."
Actor, coming out after the suicide of bullied teen Jamey Rodemeyer:
"I never ever imagined that it would be--I mean, I guess I figured people would figure it out, hear about it, but I didn't know it would be like global news! I was like, What? It was really crazy to me. People from all over the world were reaching out to me on the Internet, on Twitter. Social media makes it a lot easier now. I'm just really honored and thrilled and grateful."
Member of New Kids on the Block, coming out publicly:
“I have lived my life very openly and have never hidden the fact that I am gay! Apparently the pre requisite to being a gay public figure is to appear on the cover of a magazine with the caption ‘I am gay’. I apologize for not doing so if this is what was expected! My belief is that you live your life by example, and not by a caption on a magazine! If there ever has been any confusion about my sexuality, then you are someone that doesn’t even know me!
I love living my life being open and honest, but at this time I choose not to discuss my private life any further! My fellow band members don’t discuss their private lives with their loved ones and I don’t feel that just because I am gay, I should have to discuss mine!”
Transgender musician
“I’m really lucky, I’m really tiny, I’m very fit. So I’m blessed. I went to the Guitar Center yesterday to shop for some guitars, and the guy’s like, ‘Hi, ma’am, how are you?’ I get all gushy inside because it’s just so nice to finally [be recognized as a woman].”
Swedish professional soccer player, coming out as gay:
“I really don’t think it’s a big thing. I mean, of course it’s brave but why should be it be brave? Maybe I’m stupid but It’s just so normal for me because I’m so secure with myself and my family. But I see it’s big for others and that it’s been taboo in football. That’s sad. Where are all the others?”
CNN anchor, who came out in his book, Transparent:
“I think it would be great if everybody could be out...I think if I had seen more people like me who are out and proud, it wouldn’t have taken me 45 years to say it, to walk in the truth.”
Actress, who announced that she is bisexual:
"It's a big part of who I am and growing up when I was feeling unsure about myself and my feelings, I would hear about actresses I looked up to being very open about it. So if I can return the favor and somebody who is freaking out and confused about themselves can hear: 'You're not the only one and this is totally normal and fine and there's nothing to be ashamed about' then right on.'"
via The Advocate
I nominate Biki's comment for Comment of the Year :-)
ReplyDeleteAnton Hysen is absolutely beautiful!
ReplyDeleteI think when sport stars come out as gay they have the biggest impact on young LGBT people.
We need more current sports stars to come out, its all well and good when they have retired. But imagine the impact a current NBA or NFL player coming out would have.
MO ROCCA? KEWL! I missed that announcement!
ReplyDeleteGreat Post!
ReplyDeleteDon't forget about liberal political talker/radio host Stephanie Miller... she is great!
ReplyDeleteKeep up the great work Bob.
So many!
ReplyDeleteI had forgotten about some of these folks! Now if only the rest of the celebs still in the closet would come out too! :)
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ReplyDeleteI love this post.
ReplyDeleteSometimes, it's not enough to say "LGBT people are your friends, family, co-workers..."
Sometimes there is more impact with "LGBT people are your ice skating champions, sports heroes, Heroes and Enterprisers, news anchors, childhood idols, tough rugby dudes, soldiers and so on..."
Hope I will see the day when there are too many to list.
ReplyDeleteFantastic post, what used to be a trickle is quickly becoming a deluge of out and proud lgbt folks. And really once we are visibly everywhere, we cant be overlooked.
ReplyDelete