Bobservations

Last night around 11PM I say to Carlos:

“I’m tired, I’m going to bed now.”

“I’m going to read for a bit longer.”

“All right. Night. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

I go to bed and I’m out like a light until I get nudged:

“Did I tell you about my meeting today?”

“No, but—”

And he proceeds to tell me every detail of his meeting. When he finished, I again say how tired I am and am going to sleep, and again, after a bit I get nudged awake:

“I was talking to Ellen today …”

And he gives me a word-by-word replay of their conversation until I realize it’s now midnight and I say:

“Please, can I just get some sleep?”

“Oh sorry, night sweetie.”

And then I hear:

“How would you like to have dinner with some friends on Saturday night?”

“Can this wait?”

“Well, I mean, we didn’t get a chance to have dinner for my birthday last week and I was—”

“I guess the dinner and drinks and desert we had at Masa last Tuesday night ON YOUR BIRTHDAY don’t count?”

“Oh, I forgot.”

The worst part of this story is that we both had the day off and he’d had all day to tell me his stories but waited until I’m asleep. But hen, maybe he thought it would be the only time I had my yap closed?

This Tuxedo Tale, from April 2009 is one of many of Tuxedo enjoying his life:

Yup, that's how it's done!

You’d think that a guy who claims to have aced so many cognitive tests would know the difference between a doctor and the Messiah.

Ben Affleck has reportedly gifted his ex-wife Jennifer Lopez his entire share of their $60 million mansion for free. The former couple modified their property settlement agreement, which shows a “transfer of property among spouses” and I have two thoughts:

1] This is how JLo makes all her money, and …

B] Ben Affleck gave up $30 million to have JLO out of his life.

That’s all.

Following Cankles now-deleted image of him as Jesus, Nancy Pelosi was asked what she thought:

“You’d have to ask a psychiatrist, because it’s not worth a conversation, but it’s worthy of a diagnosis.”

Score again for Pelosi v Cankles.

After many late nights at the State Capitol to finish out the 2024 session the Georgia legislature successfully defeated ALL anti-LGBTQ+ legislation.

Yes, they stopped nearly 20 anti-LGBTQ+ bills with the help of the people of Georgia who called their representatives to make their voices heard and ended:

SB 88: a ‘don’t say gay’ bill targeting LGBTQ+ topics in schools

HB 1045: a forced outing bill against students

HB 1128: a bill to redefine “sex” to exclude trans identities

SB 141 and 519: bills to further restrict access to gender-affirming care

HB 936 and 836: bathroom bans targeting trans students

SB 438: a ban on trans students participating in sports

SB 180 ‘RFRA’: a license to discriminate on the basis of religion

HB 1140: a surprise amendment to ban trans participation from school sports and use of correct restrooms

HB 1170: a surprise amendment to restrict access to medical care for trans youth

This is the Resistance at work and proves that when we act as one and stand against hate, we win.

Cast a Goddamned Vote!

That’s the Tweet put out by Professional Grifting Grieving Widow Erika Kirk about her joint event with her future ex-husband JD CouchFucker Vance in Athens Georgia today. She claims her security detail said there was a "credible threat."

Yeah, a "credible threat" no one showing up for these two MAGAts and so Erika decided to stay home.

Elliot Meeten is a UK-based model who was scouted while having his hair cut when he was 17 and now at 27 the question is, Would You Hit It?

Architecture Wednesday: Storybook Home

Straddling the border between the Hudson Valley and the Berkshires, this not-so-tiny house comes with all the hallmarks of a fairytale summer property.

Built in 1875, it has the wood-sided gables and deep verandah of a period home, with established gardens that burst forth from the half-acre property, visited by birds and butterflies. And yet its 1,200 square feet easily make space for two bedrooms, two bathrooms, an office and eat-in kitchen. The living space has super-high ceilings and a gas fireplace, leading out to a sunroom converted from the old porch. Clever nooks hide a laundry room, pantry and energy-efficient upgrades like a full-house generator and air conditioning,

Outside are wildflower gardens, vegetable planters and an outdoor living area with a kitchen with outbuildings that include a chicken coop and it can be yours for just $480,000.

The Space

Meme Dump

Oh Melanie ... You Have Some 'Splaining To Do

Last week Melanie popped into the White House unannounced to tell the press that she knows “nut-ting” about Epstein in a long-winded rant that only seemed to suggest she knew a lot more than she was saying:

“I have never been friends with Epstein.”

And yet there are so many photos of Melanie and the pedophile and his enabler Ghislaine Maxwell looking oh so cozy. And she says her email correspondence with Maxwell was only causal but that begs the question, why sign the emails, “Love, Melania”? That doesn’t sound casual.

And it doesn’t explain why she felt the need to commandeer the podium in the Press Room and plead her case. And doesn’t explain why she decided to talk to the press, but not take one single question, on a topic her husband calls a “hoax.”

Is she throwing Cankles under the bus and, if so, why?

Coins. She wants a new pre-nup so she took her story to the press in the hopes that her husband john would put some more dough in her offshore bank accounts. I mean, she sees the grift and she wants her cut.

Her so-called “brand.” She knows that once her husband john leaves the White House she’ll be on her own and she’s trying to protect her brand of … bad hats and Botox?

Her image? Her image was tarnished the very moment she wore that ‘I Don’t Care, Do U’ jacket and continued when she was caught on tape saying, ‘Fuck Christmas.’

She said Epstein did not introduce her to Cankles, that they just met at a party … for Faux-Billionaires and Sloveneina Hooker Mail Order Brides? And what about the recordings of Epstein bragging that he was Cankles’ “closest friend for 10 years” and claiming that the first time Cankles’ schtupped Melanie it was on Epstein’s infamous “Lolita Express” plane?

What about that Mel? And what about her degrees? Although her 2016 Republican National Convention biography claimed she earned a degree in design and architecture from a university in Slovenia, reports confirmed she dropped out after her first year to pursue a “modeling” career in Milan and Paris … and on an island somewhere.

Come clean, girl, because now a group of Democrats on the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee are calling on Melanie to testify before Congress as part of their probe into the crimes of convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein:

“If the First Lady wants to clear her name, she should come before the Oversight Committee and testify under oath.”

Just like Hillary Clinton did, so Melanie, slap on a lampshade and head off to Capitol Hill to explain all the tomfuckery … well, the Tom, Dick and Harry et al Fuckery.

The Funny Papers

Gary Huck, Chris Britt, Rick McKee, Bill Bramhall, Max Espinoza, Matt Wuerker, Dennis Goris, Michael de Adder, Nick Anderson, Lalo Alcaraz, Matt Davies, Pedro X Molina, Clay Bennett, Benjamin Slyngstad