Oh, Lindsay, first the Mob Daughter says 'No' to you portraying her onscreen, and now Stevie Nicks has given you the middle finger, too.
Glenn Beck loves to shoot his mouth off, mostly without thinking. And he loves to stir the pot, making up stories about people, and where they're born and what religion they practice and such.
For a long time the wacktress has expressed interest in portraying Stevie Nicks in a movie of the songbird's life, but the Fleetwood Mac singer not-so-ALLEGEDLY made it quite clear that that she will not let this happen until Lindsay cleans up her act.
And this is straight from the mouth of La Nicks: "That's never going to happen unless she cleans up her life and becomes the great actress I feel she can be. Everybody thinks I hate her, and it's not that at all. I just want her to get it together. I was completely messed up for a long time and I got it together. She's a very talented girl… If she could get it together, she could have a really big career and she could do great things."
But first she'll have to give up the pills and the booze and the stealing of things that don't belong to her; not to mention the DUIs, the kidnapping, the car theft, the rehab, the jail time.
Yeah, I don't see this movie happening anytime soon.
And it all started because of Glee.
Beck apparently got his granny panties in a twist when My Chemical Romance song, 'Sing' was performed on the hit show. He then took it upon himself to warn all parents that their children could be watching damaging material and that "our whole culture ... is set up for you and the values you grew up on to lose."
He begged parents to pay attention to the lyrics: "This is propaganda ... It's an anthem saying 'Join us.' How can you and I possibly win against that?"
A song that asks you to 'Join us' sung on a TV show about a high school glee club and it's the beginning the end.
I'd say, Oh how the mighty have fallen, but then Beck was never mighty, except in his own head.
And the song in question that wants the children of America to join My Chemical Romance? Well, it isn't propaganda, it's actually a re-recording of an old song, released to raise money for the Red Cross' efforts in earthquake-ravaged Japan.
My Chemical Romance lead singer, Gerard Way, says: "I think the word Glenn Beck was looking for was 'subversion' not 'propaganda,' because I don't know what [the lyrics] would be considered propaganda for? Truth? Sentiment? And I can't tell what he's angrier about, the fact that it's how I feel about the persistent sterilization of our culture, or the fact that it's on network television for everyone to hear."
And then Way makes note of the fact that Beck has misquoted the actual lyrics, replacing the term "webways" with "railways."
Gerard Way: "...Railways? Is it 1863? Seen any children living on these lately instead of the Internet? I'm actually shocked that no actual fact-checking was done on the lyrics. I mean, Fox is a major news channel, covering factual topics in an unbiased and intelligent ... oh wait."
Glenn Beck's TV career ends in the coming months. And not a moment too soon.
What a dick.
Andy Dick, that is.
The comic[?] was arrested at a Temecula, California restaurant the other night for, as police put it, acting disorderly, ALLEGEDLY under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.
This comes on the heels of Dick's appearance on Marc Maron's WTF Podcast last week, in which Dick said he was about to embark on a long booze-free period in his life: "There's been times when I haven't drank for three years in a row ... Right now, I know I'm in a very long stretch of complete abstinence and sobriety."
Oops. Never mind.
Dick has also admitted that he's been to rehab eleven times. fingers crossed for Time Number Twelve.
Who will it be?
Who will be the last guest on the last episode of The Oprah Winfrey Show.
It has to be someone of superstar status. it has to be someone Oprah admires. it has to be someone whom Oprah finds the most fascinating person in the entire world, and the only person worthy of making TV history by being the Big O's final guest.
Who will it be?
Well, sources--and by sources, I mean the team of cake wranglers who keep Oprah in pastries--say the final big-name-greatest-person-ever-in-the-whole-wide-world to be interviewed by Oprah will be..............................................................Oprah.
An insider, who ALLEGEDLY has his lips permanently attached to Winfrey ass, says, "How can one celebrity possibly sum up 25 years of such a groundbreaking show? Who could possibility come on the show and represent everything Oprah has done" from celebrity interviews, to human-interest stories to politics to women's issues to breaking news. She's done it all, my source says, and "only one person could do that and that is Oprah herself."
Well, if Oprah interviews Oprah, they'll need to get two big-assed chairs in the studio, and teams and teams of men to hold up both of those big fat ego-filled heads.
'The Tudors' star Jonathan Rhys Meyers, or as i like to think of him, Britain's Lindsay Lohan, has checked into rehab, again, for alcohol addiction.
In fact, rumor has it that the 33-year-old actor spent 10 days at a London clinic last month.
Then he left because he had to go to work. And then stop off at the pub for a pint.
This is ALLEGEDLY Meyers' fourth stint at rehab. It's like he and Lindsay are in a race, though he doesn't seem keen on adding jewel theft and kidnapping to his resume, as Lohan does.
It's been just a year since Rhys Meyers last sought help for his alcohol addiction. That rehab stint came on the heels of his ALLEGEDLY abusing airport staff after they banned him from getting on a flight while intoxicated.
Meyers was also previously arrested in 2007 at the Dublin Airport for being drunk and disturbing the peace, though the charges were later dropped.
He was also detained by police in June 2009 at the Charles De Gaulle Airport in Paris after allegedly assaulting an employee at a bar while drunk.
The incident last year, though, was what ALLEGEDLY caused his long-term girlfriend, Reena Hammer, to say, "Check into rehab or I'm dumping you."
I think he must have taken that for, Check yourself into rehab, but then start drinking again once you come out.
Oh, Jesse James.
You married America's Sweetheart, Sandra Bullock. Then you fucked around on her and got caught, and became The Biggest Loser. And you've spent the last couple of years trying to atone for your ways, asking for forgiveness, saying you still love Sandra.
You have a funny way of showing it, pal.
Jesse James recently told Howard Stern that Kat Von D outperforms Sandra Bullock in the bedroom by 100 fold.
Yeah, that'll win her back.
And this comes after his last interview where he says he secretly wanted to get caught schtupping anything and everything, including the tattooed Nazi girl, during his marriage with Bullock: "I think I wanted to get caught. It was me trying to self sabotage my life."Then he cries when talking about the son he and Bullock wanted to adopt; the son Bullock adopted on her own after he cheated. "I could cry so much about [Louis] until I have to suck it up and keep a stiff upper lip and realize, hey, [there are] three kids that I do have ... I've never seen Louis since everything."
And you think you should be able to see him? You cheat on his mommy and then publicly announce that you've found a better lay, and that should entitle you to some sort of relationship with her son?
Oh, honey. No.
If at first you don't succeed, make your first husband your third husband.
Marie Osmond has remarried ex-husband Stephen Craig. They were initially married from 1982 to 1985 and have a son. Osmond then married music producer Brian Blosil in 1986, and then divorced him in 2007. That marriage brought Osmond seven children--two biological and five adopted.
Osmond, who cited severe mental cruelty when she divorced Craig twenty-five years ago--though they have remained friendly--now says, "I am so happy and look forward to sharing my life with Stephen, who is an amazing man as well as a great father to my children."
This news comes a little more than a year after Osmond's 18-year-old son, Michael Blosil, committed suicide. Rumors of Marie and Stephen remarrying began circulating back then, The re-newlyweds chose May 4 to commemorate the birthdays of both her deceased son and late mother. "It was important that both Michael and my mom were with us on this special day," Osmond says.
Nice, I guess.
The Mormons don't want the gays to marry, but I guess Mormons can marry, and divorce, and marry again, and divorce again, and then remarry their first spouse.
They don't want gays to even marry once.