I love a New Year.
A fresh start, so to speak, and the thought of infinite
possibilities, even though there is that darkness of anger and racism and greed
all around us. But maybe I am a bit of a Pollyanna, I believe times are
changing; people are growing tired of division and hate, of billionaires complaining,
tired of religion as politics, tired of faith being used as a weapon against
women, immigrants, people of color and LGBTQ+ people.
Think of what might happen if women and people of color,
immigrants and LGBTQ+ Americans, along with our allies, all stood up and voted
every single time; think of the changes we could make in this country …
equality, fairness, acceptance.
And, while the numbers may be adding up faster than I ever
thought possible, I like the idea of being another year older, and another year
wiser; okay, maybe not that older shiz. As I once told my sister, who thought I
never looked any older, The Gays aren't allowed to age, so I don't mind the
extra year under the belt … as long as it doesn’t puddle over my
belt.
I look back on the past year, remembering the good times,
the tough times, the bad and sad times, because they are all a part of life. I
still wake up every morning, look out the window to his spot beneath the trees
and say Hello to Tuxedo and then whisper Goodnight atm the end of the day; I
still miss the Pocket Dog racing through the house like a small black blur; and
I miss MaxGoldberg, heavy as a cinderblock, sleeping on me at night.
And yet while looking back, I also look forward to doing
more, and learning more, thinking more, reading more, loving more, laughing
more. These aren't resolutions, as I don't make resolutions because when I do,
they last about as long as it takes me to say ‘resolution.’ These are promises
and wishes, hopes and dreams, positive thoughts that 2025 will be a far better
year for all of us, around the world, than 2024.
So, I'll leave you all to have a good day, with a repost of some New Year’s Day
thoughts:
The more things change :::blibbety blah blay bloo touch
me::: the more they remain the same: I am a believer in happiness.
My parents raised their children to believe that happiness is all we really get
in life, and that everything else follows.
Things don't make us happy, at least not for
long. And you can't expect people to make you happy either; you either
have it to begin with, and others add to it, or you don't. If you don't believe
that, just look around at all the sad, angry, lonely faces you pass on the
street. Happiness is something you possess, that you give out, and get back.
But we are each responsible for our own happiness; responsible to find it, to
hold on to it; to nurture it and share it.
Without happiness in ourselves, for being ourselves, how
can we expect to live fully and completely? We suffer loss every day; I've
had my share and, sad to say, I know there's more to come, but I feel happy in
the memories I have of those who've gone on ahead. I still, even as I reread
this from years past, mourn the loss of my father; he would have loved the Dodgers
winning the World Series and he would have screamed at America once again for believing
a liar.
I like to think things will get better, though it might
not be the better I was thinking it would be, but I have seen tough times and I
have seen them get better, so I will remain hopeful, because of the things I
have learned.
I learned, from my Father the Teacher, never to stop
learning and reading and speaking and, well, ranting; the more you learn, the
more you grow, and understand, the more happiness you can accept. I've
also learned that the best thing you can do for the people you love is to be there
when they need you.
I learned, from my Mother the Nurturer, to care for
things, for people, for animals, for life; to make each day better for those
around us, and to make it better for ourselves in the end. I have
learned to hold family close; never let them go; whether it's the family
you were born into, or the family you created out of necessity; hold on to
them, and protect them, and love them.
I learned, from my Sister the Temper, to speak up; why
sit quietly and let things happen to you? Stand up and demand the things you
want, the happiness you want. Don't settle.
I learned, from my Brother … well, let’s just say he
taught me that people change dramatically … they ignore science, even after
contracting COVID; that people who never voted will support a traitorous rapist
racist. He taught me that people change, and not always for the better, but we
are all human and perhaps one day he will change again.
I learned from the Blog People that, while we all may
have different lives and different backgrounds and different ideas, we can
communicate and listen and learn. I thank all of you for your blogs and the
things you say that make me laugh and smile, cry and rant, learn, and even
sometimes sing and dance.
I learned from the pets we lost in the last year or so
... MaxGoldberg, Tuxedo, and Ozzo ... and the ones we've lost through the years
that sheer, unmitigated joy and pure unconditional love are real things to be
accepted and given right back.
I learned, from my Husband the Optimist, how to actually
let go and be in love and damn the torpedoes; how to be open and honest and
know that it won't hurt; how to love yourself, and everyone around you; how to
take what you’re given, the good and the bad, and live with it, and adapt to
it. His eyesight continues to worsen with each passing year and yet he
soldiers on, telling people that he may be losing his eyesight, but not his
vision.
So, I once again realize that I have learned to be happy;
I've earned happiness and I am responsible for keeping it. It is, after all,
all you really get in life.
Happy. New Year.
xoxo
Bob, Carlos, Consuelo and Rosita. |