Bobservations

Carlos thinks he’s funny. He’s a lot of things, sweet and smart and kind but he’s acquired taste of funny; he likes to make up jokes … like the email he sent to his friend Ellen who had a birthday last week. He wrote her a poem about aging joke and, yes, those can be funny if you’re turning forty or fifty, but when you’re turning 70+ a joke about how you started your life in diapers and you’ll be ending your life in diapers, is not necessarily funny to everyone.

Ellen was not amused—but to be fair, Ellen has no sense of humor.

But then later that same day I was purging the kitchen of things we didn’t need, don’t use, don’t want and I came across this oddly-shaped whisk; it looks like a large cone-shaped spring on a handle—perhaps a potato masher—and we don’t use it so I opted to donate it. Then Carlos saw it and said maybe he’d send it to his friend Byron who might like it as a sex toy, and I said:

“Honey. Honey. Sweetie. You’re not funny. You’re cute as a bug’s ear, sweet as all get out, and kinder than a pack of singing nuns in a Disney movie, but you’re not known for the funny.”

He put down the whisk.

This Tribute to Cats [and Dog]  is from March 2011 …  Caturday....With A Small Dose Of Dog[?]urday

Tuxedo and Max Goldberg like to sneak off for a 'nap'. Yeah, that's it......nap.

My two handsome men!

Consuelo Roca Jones. Hey, if she doesn't know I'm taking her picture, I don't get the stink eye!

And speaking of stink eye, Tallulah was giving it on the down-low when I caught her playing with Consuelo's toy.

And Ozzo, poor Ozzo. He begged not to be included on Caturday. He.Begged.

JD Vance gave a speech in which he noted that “we are about to celebrate the 25th year” of 9/11.

Celebrate? I think you mean commemorate dumbass because we are not celebrating the murders of 3,000 Americans.

Ever.

Sixteen years ago, Google pulled its search engine out of China because they chose not to submit to an authoritarian government.

Today they are renaming lakes because a fascist, sitting on the toilet at 2AM, told them so.

I have been watching Westies about New York in the 70s and the Irish and Italian mob going head-to-head. It’s good; gritty and dirty and then, of course, hot.

And by hot I mean that guy up there, Tom Brittney, who plays James, the good bad guy. He looks good in his jeans and even better out of his jeans..

Smolder. 

Just as I have never called that bloated, farting, diaper-shitting, racist, rapist, pedophile, grifting criminal my president,. I will never call the Gulf of Mexico by any other name, nor will I ever call Lake Ontario anything other than Lake Ontario. And the Kennedy Center will always be the Kennedy Center.

This is all a deflection for his inept ability to fix the economy, stop a war he started for no reason, and keep us from finding out how many young children he raped on Epstein’s Island.

Flock CEO Garrett Langley thinks you don’t deserve the right to privacy so his Flock Cameras are going up everywhere to watch you, but … Langley has blurred his house in Google maps because he thinks he deserves the right to privacy.

Think on that. 

Clark Bockelman is a thirty-four-year-old American high-fashion model who rose to prominence in the early 2010s due to his classic blond, muscular, "all-American" look … so, Would You Hit It?

Architecture Wednesday: Two Holes of Water Road Compound

This East Hampton Compound sits at the end of a white pebble driveway amid beautifully manicured grounds where a covered porch opens to a gracious foyer, introducing interiors that balance sophistication with exceptional craftsmanship. An additional adjoining lot with a letter of buildability can support a substantial home, pool, tennis, and garage, completing this four-acre compound situated between East Hampton and Sag Harbor Villages and just moments from beautiful ocean beaches.

The home features six Bedrooms and seven bathrooms spread out over 5,300 square feet. The main level features a spacious living room with two French doors, a marble-mantel wood-burning fireplace, and an effortless sense of light and scale. The eat-in chef's kitchen by showcases high end appliances, a generous center island with seating, and a walk-in butler's pantry with two wine cellars … one can never have enough wine … and a pantry painted head-to-toe in carmine red.

The dining room, with arched doorways, hand-painted walls and ceilings, and an abundance of windows and French doors, is just off the kitchen while the library is wrapped in floor-to-ceiling bookshelves providing a sophisticated, cozy retreat. The first-floor primary suite features French doors opening to a private patio, beamed ceilings, built-in closets, a glass-enclosed office, and an elegant bath with a pedestal tub and marble shower.

Additional highlights on this level include a stone-tiled mudroom connecting to the two-car garage, a custom laundry room, and a full bath with custom tiles and a marble sink. A spindle staircase leads to the second floor, which offers a second primary suite with beamed tray ceilings, six windows, and an en suite bath with an alcove soaking tub and custom vanity. Three additional en suite guest rooms and a landing area with built-in seating complete this level.

The 2,200 square foot basement level continues the home's sense of luxury with a large media room, dining area lined with bookshelves, kitchenette with stone counters, and a second laundry room. A sixth bedroom, seventh bathroom, gym, custom built-in seating, and a linear wet bar complete the space.

The landscape surrounds the property in natural beauty with hundreds of trees, including 30-foot Lebanese cedars, Asian pines, and gingkoes. A heated Gunite pool and spa are bordered by crepe myrtles, boxwoods, wisteria, and stone fruit trees and the patio offers multiple areas for entertaining, while a hidden path leads to an outdoor shower and a separate outbuilding housing a large sauna.

All for just a smidge under ten million!

As always, click to emBIGGERate …

Dwell

Meme Dump