Bobservations

The other night Carlos nodded off in the evening and began snoring … like a chain saw … so loud that Rosita jumped from his lap and went to the back of the house … so rough that his head was vibrating like the couch came with an electric massage option … and when I said:

“Sweetie pie, go to bed. You’re snoring.”

And he said:

“I wasn’t asleep.”

Seriously.

This Tuxedo Says is from October 2020 … If you were looking for a good reason to vote, Tuxedo says you should think of it like this:

I have recently learned that crows can hold a grudge against a person for over 17 years and I have officially found my spirit animal.

Oh, and this is my bird call … and, yes, that’s the little dance I do.

The other day at The Adventures of Travel Penguin and he was discussing foods from his recent trip across the pond, specifically Haggis. I replied that I might try Haggis and then call it done, but it got me to thinking about trying new things so I asked people at work and they were less than enthused. Not one would try Haggis, or Sushi, or Offal, or Raw Oysters, and I berated them … politely … saying you should try something at least one before saying never, and a co-worker asked me:

“So, then you've had had sex with a woman?”

“Nope. There are times when you just know.”

I mean, as I like to say, the last time I was near a vagina I was being born, but that’s just me.

Apparently there’s a new word cruising the halls of DC and one reporter dared to use the word at The Felon’s press conference when she asked him about TACO … Trump Always Chickens Out. You know, because the tariffs are on, the tariffs are off; the tariffs are 150%, the tariffs are 50% ...

And the bloated gasbag had a fit and gargled and bubbled and stumbled over his word … singular … but did manage to confuse tariff with tax.

TACO.

Of note, Harvard has never been shut down for fraud, but The Felon’s eponymous university? Yeah, not so much.

First Lady and nude model, Melanie, is using AI to record the audio version of the book she wrote plagiarized:

“I am honored to bring you Melania—The  AI Audiobook—narrated entirely using artificial intelligence in my own voice.”

When I think of Melanie I do think “artificial” but I never think “intelligence.”

I love me some Kelly Clarkson because the girl can saaaaang … and can sing almost any genre. Still I was stunned when she trotted out this macabre and dark take on ‘If I Only Had a Brain’ from The Wizard of Oz.

Brilliant.

Ryan Ball is a model … that’s all I can find … but he looks good in clothes and out of clothes so, Would You Hit It?