I Didn't Say It

Matt Bomer, actor and longtime Husband-In-My-Head, accepting HRC’s Impact Award with a message on not shying away in the face of oppression:

“The other day I went to a home store with a Pride flag hanging outside. The two men who owned the place told me their store had been vandalized, their Pride flag torn down a few times and hate-filled people drove by on more than one occasion screaming expletives at them. With the brutal murder of shop owner Lauri Carleton not far away in Lake Arrowhead still very much in their mind they told me they were closing their store and moving their business online. And in that moment I felt that child in me that denied my true self for so long creep back into my head. I know that urge to run. When I left their shop I thought of that line from ‘The Normal Heart,’ “New oppressions are always forming from the ashes of the old.” The fight for justice, for a better world, for civil rights or access to medicine is a never-ending fight. When we compartmentalize, hide or separate it only emboldens the haters of the world. We change hearts and minds by continually being who we are. This coming election year, more than ever, our community has got to show up, for my kids, for yours, for shop owners that want to hang a rainbow flag outside their store without the fear of it being torn down, and for anyone who yearns to hold their partner’s hand in public and know the glorious feeling of being whole.”

He's right; silence gets us nowhere, especially when the Right is gunning for us. Speak up, act up, come out, live out. and vote.

All day, every day.

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Marjorie Taylor Greene, wingnut ReTHUGlican, crying about her own party:

“Republican voters across the country are sick and tired of Republicans because they never do anything to hold this government accountable. Republicans go out on the campaign trail and go on TV and do their five-minute hearing videos, and posts up on social media, and say all this garbage about how they’re going to fight it and stop it. I feel like many of the American people that think that Republicans in Congress completely failed them. I feel the same way, and I’m a Republican member of Congress.”

Maybe try working for The People, Marge, and not for your own  GOP interests. The problem with your party is you and The Groper and The Predator and The Pedophile Enabler and The Christian Nationalist at the podium.

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Brad Pitt, on the idea of beauty:

“When you see a person, do you just concentrate on their looks? It’s just a first impression. Then there’s someone who doesn’t catch your eye immediately, but you talk to them, and they become the most beautiful thing in the world. The greatest actors aren’t what you would call beautiful sex symbols. I’ll tell you who my favorite actress is Dianne Wiest. And you wouldn’t call her a sex symbol [but] Dianne Wiest is, to me, the most beautiful woman on the screen.”

He's right about Wiest; she’s a brilliant actor. I first saw her in a film called Independence Day—not to be convinced with that Will Smith monstrosity—and she takes over the screen every time she’s on it.

PS In the interests of transparency, I will also say that Brad Pitt is a Husband-In-My-Head, too, which, yes, I know, makes me a Mental Bigamist. Sue me.

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Kayleigh McEnany, on Hannity, about that vote in Ohio on Tuesday:

“On the issue of abortion in Ohio tonight, we continue the losing streak in the pro-life movement. Every ballot initiative has been lost post-Dobbs for the pro-life movement. As a party, we must, we must not just be a pro-baby party. That’s a great thing. We must be a pro-mother party. We need a national strategy to help vulnerable women because the results of next year’s election could be determined by that.”

First off, Bullshit Barbie, you are not the pro-baby party if you force women to give birth and then allow those children to grow up to be slaughtered in schools. And a pro-mother party would be the one that allows women to make their own healthcare choices.

Be honest, your party is about controlling women and forcing them to follow the rules of your invisible friend.

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Kelly Johnson, Christian Nationalist Mike Johnson’s wife, on her wonderful man:

“I know it goes along with the territory here, but I will say it makes me very sad, it breaks my heart. Because I just wish that they knew this guy that I know. He is one of the most loving, kind, genuine people I know. He loves all people and would give you the shirt off his back. I used to be a schoolteacher and I loved that, but I just felt burdened for so many people and I felt the calling to go back to school to become a Christian counselor. And it’s because I love people and want to help them through the times when they’re struggling and suffering. I love what I do.”

The Gays don’t want your help, and The Gays didn’t ask for your help, and no matter how much you talk like a little girl—and if that’s what Mike is into, time for a rethink—you can’t hide what you’ve tried to do to the LGBTQ+ community with your conversion therapy ideas.

We are only struggling to have people like you faux Christians simply let us be.

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Pete Buttigieg, Secretary of Transportation, speaking to Stephen Colbert about Mike Johnson’s claim that gay marriage brings “dark chaos”:

“Maybe we’ll just have him over. If he could see what it’s like when I come home from work, and Chas is bringing the kids home from daycare or vice versa, and one of us is getting the mac and cheese ready and the other’s microwaving those freezer meatballs—which are a great cheat code if you’ve got a toddler and you need to feed them quickly—and one won’t take their shoes off and one needs a diaper change. Everything about that is chaos, but nothing about this is dark. The love of God is in that household.”

Mike Johnson is a hate-filled man who believes the invisible man in the history book is his ruler, but then he uses the so-called word of god—yes, little g—to make himself feel superior to others and to keep others … women, people of color, LGHBTQ+ people … down.

If you believe in god you cannot believe that god is hate. That’s your own choice.

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Bobservations

This week, eating breakfast and watching GMA, there was a story about Facebook doing an online graduation ceremony for 2020 high school seniors.

Oprah Winfrey will be the commencement speaker … gag … and Awkwafina, Jennifer Garner, Lil Nas X and Simone Biles , among others would speak. And Miley Cyrus will perform her “inspirational” song, ‘The Climb.’ Carlos, with his Absent-minded Professor ears on, said:

“Decline? What? Is her credit card declined?”

And began singing:

“♫ ♪ I’m declined! I’m declined ♪ ♫”

I said:

“Honeybunch? It’s ‘The Climb,’ not ‘I’m Declined.’”

“Oh.”

More Carlos … yesterday, right after eating his breakfast, Tuxedo threw up on a kitchen rug. As we have a standing rule that I take care of what goes into the cats, and Carlos takes care of what comes out, he cleaned up.

As he bitched and whined and moaned—far, far less than I would have had the situation been reversed—I suggested we change his middle name to VomitCleaner. He said:

“I already go by that name.”

And he ain’t wrong.

Tuxedo seems to relish the fact that Carlos and I are in lockdown because now he has company …

The homeowners’ association for Fisher Island, an exclusive enclave near Miami that recently bought enough COVID-19 antibody tests for every single resident and worker on the island, has been approved for a $2 million loan through a federal program intended to help small businesses survive the COVID-19 pandemic.

It wasn’t immediately clear how the Fisher Island Community Association—the master homeowners’ group for the wealthiest ZIP code in the country—plan to use the money.

The rich get all the breaks.

Go figure … Right after asking the federal government to expand the use of its lone FDA-approved drug to coronavirus patients, Jaguar Health has more than tripled the price of the drug.  They say the need to drastically raise the price during the height of a pandemic to stave off the company’s collapse.

Earlier this year, the list price of a 60-pill bottle of Mytesi—an antidiarrheal medication which may help with the virus—was $668.52. On April 9, as more and more people were dying, Jaguar Health raised the price to $2,206.52 a bottle.

The rich get richer and the poor … die.

After closing down and sending students home due to the COVID-19 crisis, West Point is being forced to bring 1,000 cadets back to its campus—an epicenter for the virus—so _____ Trump can deliver a commencement address.

West Point had postponed its commencement, and school officials were unsure whether to hold one, until _____ announced that he would be speaking there.  Why. You may ask? Jealousy.

Last Friday, the day before Michael Elizabeth Pence was to speak at the Air Force commencement ceremony in Colorado, _____ abruptly announced that he would, in fact, be speaking at West Point. That was news to everyone, including officials at West Point, who been looking at the option of a delayed presidential commencement in June, But now, with _____ feeling butt-hurt that Pence is getting press, West Point has called back 1,000 cadets.

For the ego of _____.

The New York Times ran a few stories on the lunacy of Fox News’ chief asshat, Sean Hannity. And because he was butt-hurt about it, Hannity had his attorney Flying Monkey, Charles Harder, demand an apology or a retraction.

It all began with a piece by Ginia Bellafante about Brooklyn bar owner, Joe Joyce, who took a cruise to Spain in March, and later contracted the coronavirus and died. Now, while it is not clear that Joyce contracted the virus in Spain, his daughter Kristen Mider told Bellafante that her father watched Fox News and believed the coronavirus was under control because Hannity said so. Bellafante said that Hannity "went on air proclaiming that he didn’t like the way that the American people were getting scared 'unnecessarily.' He saw it all, he said, 'as like, let’s bludgeon Trump with this new hoax.' " 

Except it isn’t a hoax, and the shoddy, biased, half-assed vomitous mouth droppings that Hannity passes off as news may have led to a man’s death. And so, when Harder demanded an apology, and NYT legal counsel David E. McCraw responded:

"The columns are accurate, do not reasonably imply what you and Mr. Hannity allege they do, and constitute protected opinion. In response to your request for an apology and retraction …

… our answer is 'no.’”

No.

Yes, in the midst of a pandemic that is far from over, the White gift shop is now selling COVID-19 coins, emblazoned with things like:

“WE FOUGHT THE UNSEEN ENEMY” … “Everyday Heroes” … “President Donald J, _____, Vice President Michael R. Pence, Secretary S. Mnuchin, Drs. Jerome Adams, Deborah Birx, Anthony Fauci.”

The coins regularly cost $125 but buy now and you get one for $100. And, to sweeten the pot, 20% of the proceeds are donated each day to U.S. Hospitals including Johns Hopkins for its COVID-19 Coordination and Tracking.

I wonder where the other 80% goes.

I need some hot men, and a Husband In My Head now, so let’s go with Matt Bomer, who responded to a viral meme featuring a lineup of white guys—Cheyenne Jackson, Finn Wittrock, Max Greenfield, and Wes Bentley—all cast as leading men by producer Ryan Murphy, with @vintagehols saying:

“i could not name one of these men if someone put a gun to my head.”

First off, I could, and did; take that! But Matt gets the award for best Retort because he tweeted back:

“I love all of these men and their unique talents. But if you’re going to line us up and objectify us every few months like Ryan Murphy’s version of a Hitchcock blonde...then I’ve got dibs on Grace Kelly.”

And then, because he’s not just a pretty face, Bomer followed that tweet with one soliciting donations to CenterLink, a coalition of more than 250 LGBTQ community centers from 45 states, Puerto Rico, the District of Columbia, as well as Canada, China, Mexico, and Australia:

“While you're figuring out who's who click on this link and donate to Centerlink and support LGBTQ youth around the country who need a place to live, eat, and find safety right now. Even 50 cents helps!”

Hot and compassionate.

Yes, please.

So, we’re watching some movies here in Lockdown and there are some hot mens traipsing across the screen, like—clockwise:

Corey Stall, who fulfills my sexy bald man fantasy, and will be co-starring on the new season of Billions.

Nicholas Pinnock, who is giving me Denzel Washington with an extra dose of hotness, while starring in For Life.

Martin Freeman, who played Watson to Benedict Cumberbatch’s Sherlock on PBS, and is now starring in the offbeat comedy Breeders.

And comedian Jermaine Fowler, who was one of the first celebrity contestants on RuPaul's Secret Celebrity Drag Race and played Kevina Hart—brilliantly—in Snatch Game.

I do like a bowl of Man Candy in the morning.

I Didn't Say It ...

Andrew Cuomo, Governor of New York,  on _____’s claim that his “authority is total”:

“I don’t know what the president is talking about, frankly. You have to remember it’s the states that created the federal government, right? It’s the colonies that created the federal government, not the other way around. We don’t have a king, we have a president.”

Well, to be fair, we don’t have a president. We have an unhinged, ill-eqipped, unfit, mentally defective asshat in the White House.

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_____, on March 4th:

“We have a very small number of people in this country. The biggest impact was when we took the 40-plus people [from a cruise ship]. But if you don’t add that to the numbers, we’re talking about very small numbers in the US.”

April 16th: 34,000+ Americans are dead.

Fact.

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David Michaels, former Occupational Safety and Health Administration [OSHA] chief on _____’s COVID-19 response:

“I would give them an F. They’re simply missing in action in handling this epidemic. 12 weeks ago safety and health experts said OSHA should be preparing, should be issuing emergency standards to make sure workers are protected first in health care and then all these other essential workers and OSHA still hasn’t done it. OSHA has been invisible in this whole response.”

I also give them an F … as in Fucked us royally.

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Dr. Mehmet Oz, medical hack and Fox News contributor, on reopening schools because not that many children would die:

“We need our mojo back. Let’s start with things that are really critical to the nation where we think we might be able to open without getting into a lot of trouble. I tell you, schools are a very appetizing opportunity. I just saw a nice piece in The Lancet arguing that the opening of schools may only cost us 2 to 3 percent, in terms of total mortality. And, you know, any life is a life lost, but to get every child back into a school where they’re safely being educated, being fed and making the most out of their lives, with a theoretical risk on the back side, that might be a tradeoff some folks would consider.”

Hey Oz? Would you trade off one of your children for the good of the economy?

Right, So STFU you ignorant hack.

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Matt Bomer, my Husband-in-my-Head, on his husband … what? … and family making the best of the situation on Easter:

“It’s Easter 2020, ya’ll! This was the take when I told everyone to ‘just have fun with it.’ Happy Easter to everyone out there from our family to yours. Wishing you all good health, safety, and all the provisions you need—and a big thank you to everyone in the medical field, and all those providing essential services—you’re all heroes.”

Yeah, that’s how a celebrity handles the situation.

Thank those on the front line and don’t complain about life in the manse on lockdown.

PS Matt? Um, if you wanna get away, we have room in Smallville, though. Just sayin’.

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Jedediah Bila, weekend co-host of “Fox & Friends,” slamming _____ for taking a potshot at Chris Wallace, host of “Fox News Sunday”:

“Enough with the 3rd grade name-calling. Chris is doing his job. The news should not be any president’s friend, ally, or buddy. If it bothered you when Obama complained about Fox News, but you’re silent on this complete nonsense, then just stop. Seriously. Enough.”

I agree, though, Fox News helped create _____ and loves to blare his childish insults at every turn, so while you’re lambasting the president for his antics, try turning your ire back at your own network.

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Michelle Obama, pushing for vote by mail:

“There is nothing partisan about striving to live up to the promise of our country; making the democracy we all cherish more accessible; and protecting our neighbors, friends and loved ones as they participate in this cornerstone of American life.”

The more people who vote, the more democrats are elected, so this administration’s aversion to mail-in voting is purely partisan bull shiz.

Fact.

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I Didn't Say It ...

Dan Patrick, Texas Republican Rightwingnut Lt. Governor, offering a reason for the shooting in Texas:

“We may have to look at the design of our schools moving forward and retrofitting schools that are already built. There are too many entrances and too many exits. There are not enough people to put a guard in every entrance or exit …. maybe we need to look at limiting the entrances and exits into our schools so that we can have law enforcement looking at the people who are coming.”

So, it’s never guns. It’s doors. It’s trench coats. It’s abortions.

No, it’s Texas, and it’s asshats.

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Fred Guttenberg, father of Parkland victim Jaimee Guttenberg, on Patrick’s asshattery:

“I think those are the most idiotic comments I’ve ever heard regarding gun safety. Let me be clear, he should be removed from office for his failure to what to protect the citizens of Texas. To hear him continue to make the argument—after 10 people died in his state—that guns are not the issue is simply a crock.”

Hopefully more and more Americans are not buying what the GOP, the NRA-owned GOP, is spewing.

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Martin a gay man who didn’t come out until he was 85, on it being his greatest regret:

“It’s tough to be an outsider. I regret being such a sissy. So nervous. So bloody shy. I left it till I was actually 85 years old to really basically come out. I’ve missed the boat as regards to finding a lovely partner, a soulmate that I could love, live with. If you ask me if you want to set up with another young guy, go ahead, do it. You’ve got it. You owe it to yourself. And to him.”

Welcome Out, Martin. And, naturally, you’ll accept our Coming Out Toaster Oven and copy of The Gay Agenda.

See, it doesn’t matter so much when you come out, it matters that you come out.

And you, sir, have helped a great many people by doing so. Thank you.

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Donald Glover, on the rumor that his Star Wars character, the young Lando Calrissian, was sexually fluid:

“How can you not be pansexual in space? There’s so many things to have sex with. I’m serious. I didn’t think that was weird. Yeah, he’s coming on to everybody…It just didn’t seem that weird to me. It’s kind of like, the doors open. It’s like, no, only guys or girls. No, it’s anything. This thing is literally a blob. Are you a man or a woman? Like, who cares? Have a good time out here.”

And now you know!

PS He’s hot.

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Oliver North, traitorous arms dealer, blaming school shootings on Ritalin and video games:

“If school shield had been in place in Santa Fe High School, far less likely that would have happened. The problem we’ve got is we’re trying like the dickens to fight the symptom without treating the disease. The disease in this case isn’t the 2nd amendment, the disease is youngsters who are steeped in a culture of violence, they’ve been drugged in many cases. Nearly of these perpetrators are male and they’re young teenagers in most cases. They’ve come through a culture where violence is commonplace. All we need to do is turn on the TV. Go to a movie. Many of these young boys have been on Ritalin since they were in kindergarten. Now I’m certainly not a doctor, I’m a Marine. But I can see those kinds of things happening.” 

He’s not a doctor, but he knows that Ritalin is the cause. But, um, Ollie? Traitor? Criminal? What about young girls on Ritalin? Why are they shootin’ up the schools?

Oh yeah, you’re a lying, pandering, NRA check cashing asshat.

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Art Acevedo, Houston Police Chief, blaming elected officials for inaction on the state and federal level in response to repeated shootings at schools:

"Let me tell you, people at the state level and the federal level in too many places in our country are not doing anything other than offering prayers. We need to start using the ballot box and ballot initiatives to take the matters out of the hands of people that are doing nothing that are elected into the hands of the people to see that the will of the people in this country is actually carried out. I think that the American people, gun owners—the vast majority of which are pragmatic—actually support gun sense and gun reform in terms of keeping guns in the right hands, [but] if you have firearms in your home and you do not secure them and you don't secure them in a manner that can preclude someone from grabbing them and taking them and carrying out this carnage, [there] is a criminal liability that attaches. I believe that anyone that owns a firearm that doesn't secure it properly [and it] ends up in the wrong hands and used to kill innocent people, that that should carry some significant consequences. We need to think about that on the national level across this country."

Another voice of reason. Listen.

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Sarah Paulson, my favorite actress—besides Meryl—on her relationship with Holland Taylor: 

“If anyone wants to spend any time thinking I’m strange for loving the most spectacular person on the planet, then that’s their problem. I’m doing just fine.”

Word.

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Matt Bomer, My Husband in My Head, on the night during a preview of Broadway’s revival of The Boys In The Band, when the prop crew forgot to leave a towel for him during a shower scene:

“I had the choice to either do the rest of the 10-minute scene butt-naked, which would not have made any sense. Or, there’s like a glass partition, so I had to kind of coyly reach around and grab my tighty-whities and put them back on my soaking wet body, and then do the rest of the scene in wet tighty-whities.”

Okay, I’m’a just say that the crew didn’t 'forget,’ they wanted a chance for some Bomer Butt on Broadway and gave it their best shot.

I mean, it’s what I would have done.

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I Didn't Say It ....

Eric Reid, San Francisco 49ers Safety, on Mike Pence’s faked “walk out” protest at last week’s game:

"My honest reaction: ... Does anybody know the last time he's (Pence) been to a football game? With that being said, he tweeted out a three-year-old photo of him at a Colts game, so with the information I have, the last time he was at a Colts game was three years ago. So this looks like a PR stunt to me. He knew our team has had the most players protest. He knew that we were probably going to do it again. This is what systemic oppression looks like. A man with power comes to the game, tweets a couple of things out and leaves the game with an attempt to thwart our efforts. Based on the information I have, that's the assumption I've made."

It was all a plan to appease the _____-Pence base of racists and asshats.

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Carmen Yulin Cruz, mayor of San Juan, Puerto Rico, on ____ calling her ‘nasty’:

“I don’t give a shit. This isn’t about me or politics. I’m not going to be the face you see out there just giving you a box of food for the photo op. I’m the face of the person who is going to make sure somebody gets that to you … so like the last scene of Gone With the Wind — ‘Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.'”

I love that a woman cannot be groped in any way shape or form by the lying Hypocritical Bigoted Homophobic Misogynist In Chief.

It kills him that a woman is standing up to him.

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Rob James-Collier, who played the closeted butler on Downton Abbey, says he’s had trouble getting roles because casting directors just see him as the “gay bad guy”:

 “I think audiences in the US can identify quite easily with the quintessential English gent and English lady, whereas a neurotic, dark, gay character like Thomas is a hard thing to put into the American market. It can lead to typecasting. Because Thomas Barrow is gay and is, essentially, the bad guy for much of the show, a lot of people within the industry can only see you as that. They might not be in a rush to see you as a heterosexual love interest. That takes time. I always try and do something new and different. Unfortunately, it’s not always the way it turns out because it’s hard. It’s a tough game to be in. And I always say it, but there’s better actors than me out of work all the time.”

Don’t blame America because you’re being typecast; we have lots of out gay actors playing all kinds of roles in both film and TV.

Maybe it’s England, maybe it’s you ... but it’s not America.

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“President-For-Now” _____, on his horrific handling of Puerto Rico after the hurricane:

“They had these beautiful, soft towels. Very good towels. And I came in and there was a crowd of a lot of people. And they were screaming and they were loving everything. I was having fun, they were having fun. They said, ‘Throw ’em to me! Throw ’em to me Mr. President!’ The next day they said, ‘Oh, it was so disrespectful to the people.’ It was just a made-up thing.”

The made up part is that no one heard the voices in _____’s head that said to throw the towels other than _____.

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Gloria Steinem, offering a solution the gun control:

“I want any young men who buy a gun to be treated like young women who seek an abortion. Think about it: a mandatory 48-hour waiting period, written permission from a parent or a judge, a note from a doctor proving that he understands what he is about to do, time spent watching a video on individual and mass murders, traveling hundreds of miles at his own expense to the nearest gun shop, and walking through protesters holding photos of loved ones killed by guns, protesters who call him a murderer.”

Sounds good to me.

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Matt Bomer, on raising three sons—Kit, Henry, and Walker—with his husband, Simon Halls--left:

“What’s meaningful to us are manners, respect, a good work ethic, a belief in themselves, that they can follow their dreams, pursue whatever they want to pursue and to be their most authentic self. Whoever you are and whoever you want to be is accepted and surrounded with love.”

Ooh, scary gay parents raising kids to be decent human beings!

And, as always, Matt is hot!

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Donna Karan, fashion designer, standing by Harvey Weinstein and suggesting his victims have been ‘asking for it’:

“I think we have to look at ourselves. Obviously, the treatment of women all over the world is something that has always had to be identified. Certainly in the country of Haiti where I work, in Africa, in the developing world, it’s been a hard time for women. To see it here in our own country is very difficult, but I also think how do we display ourselves? How do we present ourselves as women? What are we asking? Are we asking for it by presenting all the sensuality and all the sexuality? And what are we throwing out to our children today about how to dance and how to perform and what to wear? How much should they show? You look at everything all over the world today and how women are dressing and what they are asking by just presenting themselves the way they do. What are they asking for? Trouble.”

Wait. So if a woman dresses a certain way she’s asking to be sexually assaulted, Donna?

Wow.

Maybe women should stop by any Donna Karan clothing items, lest, by wearing them, they inspire a man to rape them.

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