Do Not Come For the Divine Miss M

Last month, Bette Midler called out ALLEGED Democrat, Senator Joe Manchin in a tweet that also badmouthed West Virginia:

“What Joe Manchin, who represents a population smaller than Brooklyn, has done to the rest of America, who wants to move forward, not backward, like his state, is horrible. He sold us out. He wants us all to be just like his state, West Virginia. Poor, illiterate and strung out.”

Now, there was a backlash because, clearly, not everyone in West Virginia is a low-income addle-brained meth head and so Midler went back to Twitter to apologize, and also take on Manchin again:

“I apologize to the good people of [West Virginia] for my last outburst. I’m just seeing red;  Joe Manchin and his whole family are a criminal enterprise. Is he really the best WV has to offer its own citizens? Surely there’s someone there who has the state’s interests at heart, not his own!”

Well, this week, West Virginia Governor Jim Justice gave his State of the State speech and went after Midler himself. He held up his bulldog Babydog—seriously, this is what a grown man calls his dog—turned her rear end to the cameras and said:

“Babydog tells Bette Midler and all those out there, ‘kiss her hiney.’”

Oh snap … except Bette Midler has zero fucks to give either Manchin or Justice; she retweeted a picture of the stunt with the caption:

“Here we can see a dog’s asshole. Right next to it is the butt of Jim Justice’s dog.”

And then to prove her point, she Tweeted this:

“BTW, here are the state rankings of all the areas and agencies for which the so-called ‘Governor’ of [West Virginia], Jim Justice, is responsible. Judging from these rankings, I’d say his dog’s ass would make a better Governor than him!”

Do not come for Midler unless she sends for you.

Random Musings

This week the 7th Circuit Court of Appeals issued a major ruling in Whitaker v. Kenosha Unified School District that transgender students are protected from discrimination under Title IX and the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th Amendment.

Bam.Snap.

The court upheld the preliminary injunction, issued by a federal district court in September 2016, that has allowed Ash Whitaker, a senior at Tremper High School in the Kenosha Unified School District in Kenosha, Wisconsin, to use the boys’ restrooms at school throughout his senior year without fear of discipline or invasive surveillance by school officials. The court wrote:

“The School District has failed to provide any evidence of how the preliminary injunction will harm it, or any of its students or parents. . . . , whereas the harms to Ash are well-documented and supported by the record.”

Cuz, you know, he just wanted to pee.

“I am thrilled that the Seventh Circuit recognized my right to be treated as the boy that I am at school. After facing daily humiliation at school last year from being threatened with discipline and being constantly monitored by school staff just to use the bathroom, the district court’s injunction in September allowed me to be a typical senior in high school and to focus on my classes, after-school activities, applying to college, and building lasting friendships. As I look forward to college next year, I hope my case will help other transgender students in Kenosha and elsewhere to just be treated the same as everyone else without facing discrimination and harassment from school administrators.”—Ash Whitaker

The march goes on ...

Mexican lawyer Antonio Battaglia has created a new toilet paper, “_____ Paper” to benefit migrants and U.S. deportees now residing in his hometown of Guanajuato, Mexico.

Battaglia was angry about Donald Trump’s hate-filled campaign rhetoric on Mexicans, but, rather than give in to negativity, he turned creative to make it clear “that Mexicans are not ‘bad hombres.’”

Battaglia initially tried to register for a trademark in clothing or footwear, but the “_____” brand had already been registered for the items, so he came up with the idea for toilet paper .... The sanitary product will begin production at the end of this year, and distribution is planned throughout various Mexican groceries and supply chain groups.

So, you know, people can wipe their rumps with _____s.

And speaking of ... lotsa folks feel that _____ is mentally unfit to be President and suspicions that he perhaps suffers from a mental illness, or JPS—Just Plain Stupidity—are on the rise, and this story won’t help ...

In a recent video clip, a glassy-eyed _____ was captured wandering away from a meeting with Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu for seemingly no reason at all, looking completely lost

. _____ suddenly left Netanyahu’s side, leaving the Prime Minister and all surrounding staff shocked and confused. In the clip you see ____ wander off, and a hand seems to guide him back to Netanyahu. He reappears looking completely lost and then shake’s Netanyahu’s hand.

The far-away look in Trump’s eyes is unsettling, to say the least, because even while some of us joke that he’s unfit, this looks very frightening.

And add to that the fact that he skipped events the next day for “exhaustion”?

Just sayin’.

So, a few months back I took Carlos clothes shopping for his birthday—the man will never buy clothes and still wears clothes from the 80’s ... the 1880s.

And this time he wanted a pair of white jeans and the stores we went to didn’t carry them; the salesman told him we should try stores on Columbia that have a larger supply, while I muttered something about not having a DeLorean and this isn’t Back to the Future and the Era of the White Jean.

Anyway, this past weekend we’re out running errands and Carlos spots an Old Navy and wants to check there for his white jeans. In we go and Voila! white jeans. He tries them on and then decides to get them and so we head to the checkout. In the line he finally looks at the price-tag and shrieked like a howler money:

“Forty-four dollars!??!”

I replied:

“Welcome to 2017, Marty McFly.”

Luckily the jeans were marked down to just $32 or we might have had another episode of Carlos not being able to breathe.

 is back and so is their quintet of Hotties. The show is about a semi-smalltime crime family lead by the fabulous Ellen Barkin, who uses her sons to steal and rob so she doesn’t have to work and can like in her mid-century modern LA pad with a pool.

Her Hottie sons include coke-head Craig—Ben Robson—her grandson J—Finn Cole—her closeted son Deran—Jake Weary—her ‘adopted’ son Baz—Scott Speedman—and her jailbird paranoid son Pope—Shawn Hatosy.

It’s beefcake, I tell ya, beefcake.

Also whilst running errands we were listening to The Prairie Home Companion. As usual, their musical guest was a folk-country singer—the kind of music Carlos loathes—Brandi Carlile.

Now, I like some country-folk, especially when the lyrics are really good ... cuz I loves me some words ... and this song didn’t disappoint, especially in the lyric:

“There's one thing they don't tell about the blues when you got 'em, you keep on fallin' 'cause there ain't no bottom, and they're ain’t no end"

Loved that one, and loved that I discovered the song, “Red Dirt Girl [Lillian]” was written by a favorite of mine, Emmylou Harris.

But I’ll give you Brandi’s version from the show:

Kathy Griffin and the head .. I cut out the head in that photo.

Disgusting. A desperate attention grab by an attention-seeking whore who acts like she had no idea that holding up a mock severed head of another human being might be seen as idiotic.

It is; look, y’all know I have nothing but disgust for _____, but this is too far, too much.

And of course, the instant the shiz hit the fan and CNN fired her from the New Year’s Eve show—because Anderson Cooper wanted it done—and as soon as she lost another endorsement deal and some gigs were canceled, Kathy ran to Twitter to faux-pologize and beg forgiveness.

“I sincerely apologize…I’m a comic. I crossed the line. I moved the line, then I crossed it. I went way too far. The image is too disturbing. I understand how it offends people. It wasn’t funny. I get it. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my career. I will continue. I asked your forgiveness. Taking down the image. Gonna ask the photographer to take down the image. And I beg for your forgiveness. I went too far. I made a mistake, and I was wrong.”

Y’all know I love inappropriate humor but this was too far and even the apology was an attempt to stay in the spotlight.

Sorry Kathy, you blew it.

And speaking of celebrities apologizing...

Sorry, Tiger, but just because you were hopped up on pain meds and not drunk as hell makes no difference.

You could have killed someone driving like that and there is no excuse.

Sit down, and stay down.

This is rich ... Republican Congressman from California, Darrell Issa, actually stood on the roof of his district office this week as his protesting constituents gathered outside.

Issa reportedly came outside but refused to talk to the people who elected him, the people who pay his salary.

So this is the GOP ... The 1% Congressman hiding on the roof because his constituents are mad.

One way to fix that ... vote him out.

Oh hell no ....

There’s a good chance that we won’t be seeing a performance from Tony nominee Bette Midler at the 2017 Tony Awards next weekend.

Midler is nominated for Best Performance by a Leading Actress in a Musical for Hello, Dolly, which is nominated for ten awards. While it was expected that Bette would perform the title number, it seems like it’s no longer likely.

The producers of the musical reportedly want Bette and the cast to perform live from the Shubert Theatre, where the show is performed seven times a week, rather than at Radio City Music Hall and Tony producers have reportedly declined a remote performance.

Dolly co-star David Hyde Pierce may perform a solo number, with Bette presenting if she doesn’t perform.

Oh hell no ... do not make me storm the Great White Way.

Show-queens are a vicious lot, I tell ya!

I Follow God on Twitter and She's fabulous!

Random Musings

Dear Media ...

Please refrain from saying that President _____ was “not correct” when he Tweeted that Obama had wiretapped _____ Tower; please stop saying his accusations are “demonstrably false.”

They are lies. The president lied. Donald _____ is a liar.

Thanks. Carry on.

Carlos and I really enjoy FX's American Crime, another one of those anthology shows that features a different story each season but uses many of the same actors in different roles.

The first season was about a murder and anti-Muslim sentiment; the second was about the rape of a teenaged boy. This season is about human trafficking, either for sex trade or for migrant farm workers; it’s slavery for the modern times y’all.

Brilliant acting, especially by Regina King, who has appeared in all three seasons, and Felicity Huffman, who’s also been there from the start.

That said. There was a Hot Guy in the last episode—and the hope that he may again appear-and so, for about a half second, though I think it was longer, I was all about the guy ... Sean Blakemore.

Just sayin’. Come for the Hot Guy stay for the brilliance of the show.

So FBI Director James Comey told us this week that _____ is a liar about the wiretaps and he told us that _____ and his team are currently being investigated for their ties with Russia. I felt good until ...

Comey admitted to having _____ under investigation back in October and November and yet he never said a word about that but did flap his yap about Hillary and those emails—you know, the email case that never went anywhere but may have cost her the election.

So, while I am glad Comey said what he said, I am furious he didn’t also tell us he was looking into _____ way back when. Asshat.

Think it’s not about Muslims?

Now, passengers on foreign airlines headed to the United States from 10 airports in eight majority-Muslim countries can no longer carry on any electronic devices larger than a cellphone.

This new rules, aimed at people coming here from majority Muslim nations because, yes, Muslims are terrorists, we all know that, was enacted Tuesday by the _____ based on no credible, specific threat.

Just Muslims.

The Wall Street Journal printed an editorial this week that really went after _____ but my favorite line of all is when they called _____’s credibility into question by saying,  “the President clings to his assertion like a drunk to an empty gin bottle” and, because of his lack of respect for the truth, “most Americans may conclude he’s a fake president”

Yes, they did.

Shortly after my mother passed away in 2007, my parent’s German Shepherd also died. Mt dad rescued another shepherd from a local rescue group and had her about a month or so before finding out she was also terminally ill.

Then he rescued Foxy, another shepherd and has had her about nine years. Last week, after a vet visit, he found out she has an inoperable tumor on her liver that has metastasized to her spleen and she has very little time left.

So, you know, those of you with pets, those of you who love animals, give yours a hug today for Foxy. And my Dad.

In Hell Has Frozen Over News: Woody Harrelson gives up pot after 25 years:

“The effect of it is euphoria. But when you’re doing it all the time, it just becomes … Well, you know. I feel like it was keeping me from being emotionally available.”

What the what?

Now, a lot of people got all up in arms because the _____ kids went skiing and the Secret Service went with them and we The People foot that bill but I am not one of them.

That’s what the job entails, even to the family of a president we despise.

Melania, on the other hand, squatting on her golden toilet in Manhattan and giving us the bill is another story ...

After saying he would never give his kids jobs in the White House, this week it was revealed that Ivanka “Complicit” _____ will be getting her own office in the West Wing.

I’m guessing she’s there to coddle Daddy when people are mean to Daddy, but, as Angela Merkel may have said last week, “What’s a handbag designer doing here?”

Lindsay’s back y’all!

Yup, Lindsay Lohan, America’s favorite child actress turned drug addict, turned menace to society turned jail bird turn rehab addict turned unemployed has-been may star in a new “reality show.” The Anti-Social Network. It’s apparently a show about prancing people on social media but the only people getting pranked are the network that buys it and airs it, because you just know Lohan will show up high or not at all, and the people who watch it if it gets picked up.

Consider yourselves warned.

Bette Midler is back on Broadway in a revival of Hello Dolly—currently the hottest ticket in town—and this week, during the show, about halfway through the first act, man in the audience began to feel ill. He made his way toward the aisle but lost consciousness and collapsed before the end of his row.

The show was halted, paramedics were called and they took him to the lobby. When he regained consciousness, they checked his vitals and insisted he should go straight to the hospital.

The man said:

“I’d sooner die than miss Act 2!”

And went back to the show.

Really FoxNews? Because this is what I learned ...

Russia’s cyber attack against the United States was specifically designed to undermine our democracy, hurt Hillary Clinton, and aide _____.

There are on-going investigations, dating back months, into whether or not _____ committed treason.

While there is no timetable for these investigations, by all accounts, they’re not wrapping up any time soon.

There’s absolutely zero evidence that President Obama ordered any “wiretapping” of _____ Tower.

Despite not a single shred of evidence, _____ continues to lie.

Republicans, worried about what might be discovered through these investigations, used Comey’s appearance before Congress to focus on the leaks, rather than the information that ______ may have committed treason.

But, let’s say that if all we learned Monday was that the FBI director says the current President is under investigation for potential collusion with the Russian government behind the cyber attack against the 2016 election — aka possible treason — that’s a lot to know.

So, um, to put it politely, FoxNews, get your lips off _____’s ass and f**k off.

An Open Letter To Bette Midler

Dear Bette,

I adore you; I have from the first moment I saw you … dressed as a mermaid … in a wheelchair. I admire your brassiness, your boldness, your nerve; your verve. There are days when I want to be you, even if just for a moment.

And I am a rabid Twitter follower of yours; I find your Tweets high-larious, and sometimes thoughtful, or at least, thought provoking. But this week you Tweeted something that had me feeling that you are a little less divine, Miss M.

When the news came out that Caitlyn Jenner’s “reality” show had been cancelled, I was quite pleased. When the show began it seemed to promise to be a show about trans women, and the trans community, and I, for one, felt we needed a reality show like that, if only to educate all of us about what it means to be trans.

Sadly, however, the show devolved into a Caitlyn fashion show; she was far less interesting that the trans women “friends” she had on each week, including, but not limited to, actress and advocate Candis Cayne; Jenny Boylan, the first openly transgender co-chair of GLAAD’s National Board of Directors; Jen Richards, creator of We Happy Trans, a site which celebrates positive transgender experiences; and Chandi Moore, a trans woman of color, who shared on the show how she began in the world of drag before fully transitioning to her true self.

From these women, though less so from Caitlyn, we learned more about trans women; what it means to be trans and how trans women navigate through society. I liked the show … for the first few episodes … until it became just another vehicle for a media whore. And so, when it was cancelled I breathed a sigh of relief that there would be one less “reality” show featuring a narcissist as “star.”

You also seemed relieved that the show was ending — you’ve taken on Caitlyn for her rabidly Republican leanings in the past — but then you ruined that all by tweeting this:

“Now that @IAmCait has been cancelled, will she go back to being Bruce? Will Kris take him back? Do I smell a re-wedding?!”

This I found highly offensive, insensitive, and a bit dangerous, too.

It’s offensive because the mere suggestion that a trans women, or trans man for that matter, can simply change their gender at a whim, especially once their TV show is cancelled, demeans the trans community.

She … she … cannot change back into Bruce; this isn’t like changing your clothes. It took Bruce Jenner decades to come to the understanding that he was trans; and years to transition and come out as trans and live openly as trans and so to suggest that Caitlyn Jenner would now simply devolve back into Bruce because a television show ended is, as I said, offensive.

And your remarks are insensitive because, while you thought you were making a funny at Caitlyn, you were actually putting down every single trans man or women out there; you seemed to be saying, in those few words, that being trans is nothing really, just another form of drag … of putting on clothes and make-up for a hoot; a thought for the day. It’s not; especially when we see trans women murdered nearly every single day just for being trans. To turn them into a punchline or a witty little Tweet is the height of insensitivity.

And that’s where the dangerous part comes in; when people who are less than accepting, less than understanding, read your tweet, whether on Twitter before you deleted it — was that because it suddenly hit you that it was all kinds of wrong, or because you were nailed for being less than accepting — or all over the news where it has since landed, those less than accepting people might act on their intolerance toward trans men and women.

And what about those people struggling with their gender identity, and living in a world that does not yet understand or accept them, who forget their hope for a moment, who forget their right to live as they choose for a moment, who forget they are worthy of everything the world has to offer for a moment, and end their lives.

Your words feed into that.

And think of all those trans kids, fighting to be accepted, fighting to be their true selves, fighting to use a goddamned bathroom, reading your words, the words of someone who says she’s an LGBT ally, and finding that you think them a joke; think about them and how your words hurt.

And, maybe you did, because, as I said, you deleted that Tweet … though we all know they never really go away, which is why one should really think before Tweeting.

But you deleted it and then you apologized … to the Human Rights Commission [HRC]:

“DEAR FRIENDS @HRC, WHOM I HAVE ALWAYS SUPPORTED. SORRY LAST TWEET OFFENDED. AN IDLE MUSING. I SEEM TO HAVE MISREAD THE TEMPER OF THE TIMES.”

An “idle musing”? That’s what it was? Perhaps then, most definitely, you should think before Tweeting because this wasn’t idle; and I don’t know how you could misread the “temper of the times.” Jokes about people, about innate parts of their being … skin color, gender identity, sexual orientation, age, weight, whatever … are never acceptable, never a misreading of the times.

And so I was less than thrilled by your apology because you failed to apologize to your target: Caitlyn Jenner. And where was the apology to the trans community, wounded by the shrapnel of your “joke”?

Transphobia isn’t funny; trans women are dying and it isn’t a joke; trans people are fighting for acceptance and it’s no laughing matter. So, when you demean one trans woman you demean an entire community.

And I wonder ... if you can so easily "joke" that a trans woman can flip a switch on her gender, would you say the same about gay men and women, that we can just 'go back" to being straight if our lives don';t work out, or our shows are cancelled? I doubt that, so it boggles my mind even further that you would say it about Caitlyn. 

Had you made a joke about a black woman, it would have been aimed at the entire black and you would have apologized to that community; had you ridiculed Muslim woman or a Jewish woman it would have targeted their entire community and you would have said “I’m sorry” to all of them.

As I said, Miss M, I adore you; the LGBT community adores you … though maybe a little more cautiously right now.

Throughout your career, your damn the torpedoes sense of showwomanship, you have shown us in the LGBT community that we can be ourselves; that we can live out loud, and be proud, and be who we are; and I thank you for that.

Every time you stepped into a spotlight and showed the world that you are different, that you are not what people might have expected, but dammit, you are out there and you will be yourself, in their faces, you helped a gay kid do the same thing in his or her own life.

I thank you for that. But I need to you think beyond the punchline, beyond the joke, beyond the "idle musing" and how, sometimes, what you say can have a ripple effect.

Caitlyn Jenner cannot snap her fingers and go back to being Bruce even if she wanted to, but you can snap your fingers and set them to the computer keyboard and apologize to her, personally, and to the trans community, in general.

Think on that, please.