Tuesday Thought #3

Tuesday Thought #1

Today in Christian Love: There Is No Funeral Because The Deceased Is Gay

Vanessa Collier was just thirty-three years old when she died last month, leaving behind a wife and children, and a family who just wanted a simple funeral for her. So they contacted the New Hope Ministries in Denver, and arranged to have a service; they even gave the church a memorial video to be played during the ceremony.

But the church lost the video, and asked for a second copy, and then asked the family to edit the video, removing a clip showing Vanessa Collier kissing her wife, Christina Higley, because, you know, love and lesbians and God.

Pastor — and why these not very Christ-like people call themselves pastors is fodder for another blog post — Gary Rolando, told the family:

"We don't want overt, open homosexuality in our sanctuary."

Then he added that he knew the family, loved the family, knew the deceased — her name is Vanessa, by the way, “Pastor” — and that she led an, ahem, 'alternative' lifestyle. I guess by ‘alternative’ he meant that she treated everyone the same regardless of their sexual orientation.

When the family learned that the church wanted the kiss edited from the video, they naturally refused, so on the day of the funeral, moments before it was to begin, New Hope Ministries canceled it, citing ‘technical difficulties.’

Now, to his credit, and mind you, it’s very little credit, Pastor Rolando did conduct the funeral service at another church — since they don’t bury gays at New Hope — though there was no explanation about those alleged difficulties; “Pastor” Ray Chavez [left], the founder of New Hope Ministries, refused to explain why the service was canceled so suddenly, but Rolando blamed a visiting funeral director, saying "the funeral director on that day came from a different funeral home in the chain, and wasn't familiar with New Hope's policies."

Hmmmmm, church policies? What might those be? Love one another? That policy? Judge not lest ye be judged? That one? Or maybe it’s the policy that if two women share a kiss on a memorial video then you can refuse to bury one of them? That policy?

Rolando has since said:

"I'm sorry this happened the way it did. New Hope is very sorry... It's very sad that it happened the way that it did."

Well, “Pastor,” it wouldn’t have happened that way if the leaders of the church, the “pastors” of the church weren’t bigots and homophobes, eh? It wouldn’t have happened that way if the “pastors” of the church simply believed that God is love and that God loves everyone, and it’s only the “pastors” at New Hope that hate.

God is watching New Hope and She is not happy.

via NCRM

Today In Christian Love: Pastor Cancels Funeral Of A Gay Man Because, Well, Gay

Julie Atwood was standing beside her son's casket when the call from New Hope Missionary Baptist Church came in. The pastor, T.W. Jenkins, was calling to say the service for Julie’s son, Julion Evans, scheduled for the very next day, was cancelled because Jenkins had learned, through other parishioners, that not only was Julion Evans a gay man but that his obituary had listed another man, Kendall Capers, as his husband; Jenkins told Atwood that it would be "blasphemous" to hold services for a gay man at his church.

Julion Evans was survived by his husband, his husband, Kendall Capers, his partner of seventeen years, and his legal spouse since the t married in Maryland last year.

“Pastor” Jenkins, left, claims he doesn’t condemn anyone’s, ahem, lifestyle, but since his church is anti-gay—he preaches against marriage equality—he could not, in good faith … sarcasm … perform the burial. At the same time, he didn’t mention if his church had buried any others who had lived a life in contradiction to his interpretation of the Bible.

The Evans family, because of Jenkins’ bigotry and homophobia and lack of Christian love, had just a day to make new funeral arrangements, and, with such short notice, some mourners showed up at New Hope and missed Julion’s funeral altogether.

For Kendall Capers said that was the worst part. He said he would have understood Jenkins and his position, but once they agreed to the funeral, to cancel at the last moment is, as he says, “disrespectful” and “wrong.”

And very un-Christ-like. As the story went viral — appearing on sites like  The New Civil Rights Movement, Bilerico, the Huffington Post, Gawker, and other LGBT and progressive news sites — people took to social media to express their dismay and disgust for the way “Pastor” Jenkins and New Hope treated Julion Evans, his husband, and his family.

"Right-wing Christians like these kinds of 'Christians' claim there's a war on Christians in this country. There isn't a so-called war, but if there were it would be because of actions exhibited by these kinds of churches."

"Well, you are a shining example of why I no longer believe in God...if a loving God existed, He would not allow people like you to use His name to harm others."

"The pastor of this church isn't standing on principles he is standing on judgment and bigotry. I ask him to contemplate and meditate on this question... Would Jesus approve of this? Would this be the actions of the Savior? I think you need to bow in front of the Lord and pray... pray for true guidance from Jesus. This family chose this church for a reason so where is the compassion of community? If I were a member of this congregation I would find a new church."

"And this is the cancer within your religion. You teach only hate. And praise yourself for doing so."

"I think you may have forgotten Matthew 24:40. When did Jesus EVER turn his back on someone in need? The way you treated that bereaved family, you treated Jesus himself."

"Shame on you for cancelling that young gay man's funeral. I'm sure God would be so proud of you for being so judgmental. And organized religion wonders why so many people are slipping away?"

For its part, the New Hope Missionary Baptist Church took down most of their website, including their contact information because, you know, bigots hide.

I wonder how many funerals of people who ate shellfish were cancelled by Jenkins and New Hope? Or what about people with unkempt hair, or people who touched an unclean animal? People who ate fat? And what of women who went to church within 33 days after giving birth to a boy … or 66 days after giving birth to a girl?

People who steal? Lie? Mix fabrics in their clothing? Trimmed their beard? Had a tattoo?

Funny, I bet the good “pastor” performed the services at funerals for many people who’ve sinned, but he just picks and chooses which ones he thinks are okay and which ones he thinks are so wrong that he can turn his back on a family the day before they bury their child, brother, cousin … husband.

sources:

WFLA

NCRM: Pastor Calls Mother To Cancel Her Son's Funeral

NCRM: Church That Canceled Funeral  Flooded With Negative Reviews

Our Lady of the Rosary Gay Bashes A Dead Man

Our Lady of the Rosary

John Sanfilippo was a devout Catholic, attending services at Our Lady of the Rosary Catholic Church in Little Italy in San Diego for decades.

John Sanfilippo died last week, losing his battle with emphysema, and he'd hoped to have his funeral mass held at Our Lady of the Rosary, but her was denied.

John Sanfilippo was a gay man, and that's why, even though he attended mass regularly, and even left some money to the church in his will, that his funeral mass was canceled. Over the weekend, Sanfilippo's partner of 28 years, along with his family, were notified that the church canceled the funeral because Sanfilippo was gay.

Friends, family, and neighbors were furious with the decision by the church, and took to the streets in front of the church to protest, and, as soon as the story broke on TV and the Internet, suddenly the church had a change of heart. The church, however, has not communicated the decision change to either the family of the deceased man or the media.

In an email, Rodrigo Valdivia, the chancellor of the Roman Catholic Diocese of San Diego, said: "The Diocesan office was notified about this situation earlier today... Diocesan Authorities have concluded that the funeral as scheduled at Our Lady of the Rosary Parish may take place. Plans for the ritual are yet to be made."

At the cocktail lounge that Sanfilippo owned for 28 years, Neil Thomas was not buying it: "All of a sudden, they change their mind and say, 'Well, you know, we may still allow the funeral to be here.' Why? Because they got caught in the process of denying equal rights to people?"

Yes, because they got caught being the homophobic hate-mongers that they are.

But Sanfilippo's partner and family may have the last word. They have already found another Catholic church for the funeral because they do not feel comfortable going back to Our Lady of the Rosary after being denied a funeral mass.

Even though this happened in death, this should spur Catholics on. If you are a member of a church who would allow a man to attend mass for decades, take his money into the collection plate for decades, be included monetarily in his will, and then denounce his homosexuality and deny him a  funeral, maybe you ought to rethink where you worship.


source

Good News Monday: The Times, They Are a'Changing, Even In The Navy



John Fliszar and Mark Ketterson

When John Fliszar, a Marine aviator who served two tours in Vietnam, had a heart attack in 2006, he asked his husband, Mark Ketterson, to make sure that, if he died, his ashes were interred in the Naval Academy. Luckily, John Fliszar survived that heart attack, but then last July another heart attack killed him.

His husband, Mark, remembered his request from 2006, and set about trying to keep his promise.. He contacted the U.S. Naval Academy at Annapolis and told them that Fliszar had asked to have his ashes interred at the Naval Academy's Columbarium, a waterside crypt next to the school’s cemetery.

When the memorial coordinator asked about his relationship to the deceased, Mark Ketterson didn't hesitate to tell them that John Fliszar was his husband. Mark Ketterson: “They were always polite, but there was this moment of hesitation. They said they’re going to need something in writing from a blood relative. They asked, ‘Are you listed on the death certificate?’ ‘Do you have a marriage license?’ ” 

Ketterson said they did indeed have a marriage license, from their wedding in Des Moines after marriage equality became law there two years ago. He sent the memorial coordinator a copy of the marriage license, and suddenly everything changed.


Mark Ketterson

“I was respected. From that moment on, I was next of kin. They were amazing.”

The USNA alumni association sent Ketterson a letter expressing condolence for the loss of his husband, and the USNA made certain that Mark "was treated with the same dignity and respect afforded to the next of kin of all USNA grads who desire interment at the Columbarium. We didn’t do anything differently.”

Even the USNA alumni association newsletter, when running John Fliszar’s obituary, wrote that he had two Purple Hearts for “having been shot down from the sky twice in military missions,” and that he often joked, for the rest of his life, "about his ‘government issued ankle.’” 

More importantly, it said John Fliszar was “survived by his husband, Mark Thomas Ketterson.”

As it should be.
As it, one day, will be for all of us.

source

More Hatred From The Catholic Church

Bishop Francesco Nolè, a man of God, and also, apparently, a man of few active brain cells, believes that gay people, and criminals, don't deserve funerals:

“Our behaviour, which could be perceived as mean or cruel, in the long-run often heals and evangelises. We must have the courage and tact, perhaps first informing the individual, or the families if he has passed, that it’s not possible to administer a communion or funeral. We would perhaps pray for his soul, which must be done.”

Oh, Francesco, you ought to start praying for your own soul, because goddess ain't gonna like this.