It's Monday and I'm ...

I’m not sure who annoys me more, Taylor Swift or Jada Pinkett Smith, but I do know I wish one would stop talking and the other would stop faux-dating.

Apparently Lou Diamond Phillips just moved to Scarsdale, New York and his realtor took to Facebook to ask the citizens of Scarsdale to be his friends. Really, Lou?

Rumor has it that David Beckham has been cheating on Victoria for quite some time, but since none of it was with me I don’t really care.

After getting her pregnant and coercing her into an abortion, Justin Timberlake broke up with the pop tart in a text that said: “It’s over.” Justin’s a pig.

Is this a new thing in Hollywood? First Jada says she and Will have been separated since 2016—perfect timing for her “entanglement” with her son’s friend—and now Meryl Streep and her husband announce they have been living apart for six years.

Color me shocked, but :::gulp::: Kim Kardastrophe ain’t have bad starring in this season’s American Horror Story. Of course, she plays a vile human being so is it really “acting”?

I’m just gonna say that if you’re hosting SNL but you need Pedro Pascal, Mick Jagger and Lady Gaga to assist you, should you really be hosting? And what the f**k is a Bad Bunny?

Meanwhile, back at Kim Kardastrophe, she just celebrated her 43^rd birthday … her ass is ten years old and her face is a newborn.