Showing posts with label Guns. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Guns. Show all posts

Monday, May 04, 2026

Ain't That America XL

The war in Iran ended this week … and then started up again … and then it was over and then it wasn’t over … and the Strait of Hormuz opened and closed and opened and closed and then opened and closed again … a Slovenian Hooker, married to the most divisive hate-filled pig on Earth, took to the media to whine about a comedian making a joke of her … Oh Melanie, but ya’are a joke, ya’are … the GOP is suddenly all on board for the Jeffrey Epstein Memorial Ballroom™ and suddenly want We The People to pay for that … and the war … and the tariffs and higher gas and higher food prices and less healthcare and childcare … boy, it’s costs us a buttload of money to Make America Great Again, don’t it?

According to Nationalist Christian, AKA Nat-C, Little Mike Johnson, the Secret Service needs to “tighten up” and rethink their security protocols after an ALLEGED assassin stormed a security checkpoint at the recent White House Correspondents’ dinner.

Funny, there was a photo of Little Mike scurrying from the event surrounded by Secret Service.

God sees you lying, Mike, and She’s not happy.

 

In no way to make the shooting seem like another staged event Cankles’ DOJ is not talking about guns and gunmen but is using the ALLEGED assassination attempt to justify building the $400 million Jeffrey Epstein Memorial Ballroom™ and demanding that preservationists drop their lawsuit over the building.

If a ballroom stopped gunmen wouldn’t every school in the country already have one?

Cankles says he views his repeated brushes with violence as a sign of his historic significance:

“I’ve studied assassinations, and I must tell you, the most impactful people, the people that do the most … they’re the ones that they go after and I hate to say I’m honored by that, but I’ve done a lot.”

He said he’s studied??? The man falls asleep and shits his pants during Cabinet meetings.

 

Texas GOP Representative and MAGAt Chip Roy is furious :::: foot stomp neck snap :::: that children in Texas took a poll and were asked what language was spoken in their homes and Spanish was Number 1  … English came in fourth.

Roy, for the record, was raised by a French-speaking mother and learned Spanish at an early age.

 

Former Fox News himbo and current Secretary of Transportation Sean Duffy says that Spirit Airlines suddenly shut down all business over the weekend because of … wait for it, it’s hilarious … Joe Biden:

“There was a proposed merger between JetBlue and Spirit, and Joe Biden and Pete Buttigieg, along with the Biden DOJ, decided that they did not want that merger to take place.”

But Sean, please to explain the fact that Spirit Airlines said they closed their doors because the war in Iran raised the cost of jet fuel so high that they could no longer afford to fly.

 

DINO, Democrat in Name Only, John Fetterman, is again joining hands with the GOP, this time to demand the Jeffrey Epstein Memorial Ballroom™ be built to protect the president from ALLEGED assassination attempts at future White House Correspondents’ Dinners.

Trouble is, Fetterman, the Correspondents’ Dinner is a private event that would not be held on federal property even if there was a ridiculous gold-plated ballroom existed.

 

Cankles was captured falling down to the ground as Secret Service agents ushered him away from the dais after that ALLEGED assassination attempt, but now Cankles says he went down at the urging of Secret Service agents, not because he fell.

“I started walking, and they said, ‘Please go down, please go down on the floor.’”

He also told this story:

“[I started to walk out] a little bent over but the agents said, ‘please go down to the floor, please go down to the floor.”

Funny, cuz Melanie didn’t go to the floor because she wasn’t being paid to lay down on the floor.

 

Cankles wants to rename the U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement [ICE] as the National Immigration and Customs Enforcement AKA NICE.

But to be fair, the name ICEstapo works better for the agency that kills Americans in the street and in detention centers.

 

This Just In From The Slovenian Hooker …

“Kimmel’s hateful and violent rhetoric is intended to divide our country. His monologue about my family isn’t comedy—his words are corrosive and deepens the political sickness within America. People like Kimmel shouldn’t have the opportunity to enter our homes each evening to spread hate.”

Odd coming from the woman whose husband celebrated the death of Robert Mueller, and laughed at the murders of Rob and Michele Reiner … the man who said nothing about his own party making jokes about Minnesota Representative Melissa Hortman and her husband Mark, being murdered in their home … the man whose own family joked about the attempted murder of Nancy Pelosi’s husband, Paul … the man who said he wouldn’t care if Joe Biden died …

So, Melanie, shut your fucking mouth and clean up your own house before you play the victim … AGAIN.

 

Both GOP Senator and cult member Mike Lee, and Cankles’ lapdog Pee Wee German’s wife Katie Miller sent out Tweets after the ALLEGED assassination attempt slamming the New York Times for not covering the story. Luckily, Keith Olbermann was there to explain how time works:

“Children: you’re looking at the early editions printed last night at 8 PM. Maybe if you could find an adult … she could explain to you how to tell time.”

The image of the print version of the New York Times shared by Miller and Lee went to press at 8PM and the ALLEGED assassination attempt had not yet happened. On Sunday morning the NYT had the full story on the front page.

Cankles’ shared a series of posts on X including an AI-generated image depicting himself and top officials in the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool.

Clearly, the Cankles in the photo was using AI-generated Ozempic.

 

After that ALLEGED assassin traveled cross-country via Amtrak to stage an ALLEGED assassination attempt, Amtrak announced they are considering allowing people to store guns in lockboxes on most of its trains. Amtrak says they’ve been considering the policy change since early this year, after being pressured by Cankles’ Regime to ease restrictions on transporting weapons and …

Wait, the Cankles Regime asked Amtrak to ease restrictions on transporting weapons just a few months before an ALLEGED assassin used Amtrak to travel cross-country with guns to stage a shooting?

Seriously, you cannot make this shiz up.

Cankles said he’d wear a bulletproof vest in the future in the aftermath of an ALLEGED  third assassination attempt but says it might make him look fat.

Fatter. Fatter. Thought the extra padding around the gut might take some of the glare off the extra thick Depends on the ass.

 

60 Minutes correspondent Norah O’Donnell caught Cankles in a revealing moment while asking about the manifesto of the ALLEGED assassin who stormed the White House Correspondents’ dinner saying that Cole Thomas Allen wrote, “I am no longer willing to permit a pedophile, rapist, and traitor to coat my hands with his crimes.” O’Donnell asked Cankles his reaction, to which he shrieked:

“Well, I was waiting for you to read that because I knew you would, because you’re horrible people. Horrible people. Yeah, he did write that. I’m not a rapist. I didn’t rape anybody.”

That’s when O’Donnell asked:

“Oh, you think—do you think he was referring to you?”

Aaaaaaaand scene!

As the Iran war has pushed the global economy into an oil crisis and gas prices reach a four-year high—I know y’all may have higher prices but a few months ago gas was $2.50 a gallon and now it’s $3.99—Americans’ ratings of the Cankles Regime on several issues are deeply underwater.

Roughly 76%  disapprove of his handling of the cost of living, while 72% disapprove of how he’s handling inflation. Seven in ten Americans think he’s dishonest—where are the 3 in 10 living—while 60% say he does not have the mental sharpness to serve as president.

Best of all, among registered voters, 49% say that they would vote for the Democratic candidate if midterms were held today and 44% say they would vote for the Republican.

Keep all of this in mind and remember:

Monday, February 09, 2026

Ain't That America XXX ... or Triple X-rated Thanks To Kid Rock

Another week and the upside is that no Americans were murdered by the ICEstapo, even though we have a few hours left in the weekend. But still it’s been a week of grifter and tax dodging, and billionaires getting rich while the rest of us pay their share of taxes and higher prices for nearly everything, and of the so-called president proving yet against that he is a blatant racist.

Oh America …

Over there in Milan, after getting booed at the opening Ceremonies of the Olympic, JD Vance found another way to piss people off … JD Vance’s nearly forty car motorcade Milan delayed multiple athletes and staff heading to their events; Team USA figure skater Alysa Liu was among those caught in the disruption, as the athlete nearly missed her skate after the vice president’s oversized convoy blocked access to the Milano skating venue.

Seriously, can anyone tell me what JD does during his time in office other than vacationing and getting booed?

And why forty cars? How many love seats does a CouchFucker need?

 

Cankles is renovating the Kennedy Center to the tune of $200 million at a time when the economy is in the toilet and people cannot buy food or healthcare or heat. Of course, since no one wants to perform there and acts keep cancelling now would be a good time for a refresh. But do we really need another gold-plated tribute to the Fat Bastard’s ego?

That was a rhetorical question.

 

Remember when the GOP swore that the Democrats would take your guns? Well, in another case of Every GOP Accusation Is An Admission, United States Attorney for the District of Columbia Jeanine Box Wine Pirro has vowed to arrest anyone who comes into DC  with a gun, regardless of whether or not you have a license in another district or are a law-abiding gun owner somewhere else.

 

One of Cankles’ lap dogs, Secretary of the Navy John Phelan, has been named on a flight manifest found among millions of documents related to convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein showing that he flew in 2006 from London to New York on Epstein’s private plane.

Pedophiles stick together.

 

An overtly racist video clip of the Barack and Michelle Obama was posted on Cankles’ Truth Social. The clip, which portrayed the Obamas as apes, used a centuries-old trope against the first Black president and first lady in U.S. history during the first week of Black History Month.

The White first blamed a staffer, suggesting that Cankles doesn’t do his own posting, but that was denied. And the good “christian” KKKarolyin’ Leavitt dismissed criticism of the video as “fake outrage.”

Racism is fake outrage? I guess, perhaps yes, to racists, like Leavitt who also said:

“This is from an internet meme video depicting [Cankles] as the King of the Jungle and Democrats as characters from [T]he Lion King.”

Let’s be clear … Cankles is a racist fuck; he lobbied to have five young Black men executed for a crime he did not commit; he was found guilty of refusing to rent his apartments to people of color;  he suggested Barack Obama is not an American, though Cankles himself has been married to two immigrants, both arriving here illegally.

When they show you who they are the first time, believe them.

 

The NYC Health Department announced that it has joined the World Health Organization’s [WHO] Global Outbreak Alert & Response Network [GOARN], becoming the first municipal health department in the United States to join this worldwide network of public health organizations after the U.S. withdrew from the WHO in January 2026.

GOARN provides international public health information and resources to control outbreaks and public health emergencies across the globe. The NYC Health Department follows California and Illinois health departments in joining GOARN.

New York will be safe, I guess, but the rest of the country? Not so much.

 

Mikey Weinstein, the president and founder of the Military Religious Freedom Foundation, said the nonprofit received reports from eight bases around the world that U.S. military members were being “pressured” to see “Melanie: From Whore House to White House.”

Cimon!!! These people put their lives at risk and now they are forced to watch this crap? Many are saying they preferred water-boarding.

 

If you wonder why Jeff Bezos shelled out $75 million to make “Melanie: From Whore House to White House”—with $40 million going directly to the Slovenian Hooker’s bank account, please note that Republicans’ tax cuts shaved billions off Amazon’s tax bill. Last year the company says it ran a $1.2 billion tax bill, down from $9 billion the previous year, even as profits jumped by 45% to nearly $90 billion.

Huh, you make $90 billion more last year than the year before and yet your taxes go down $8 billion.

Stop trusting the GOP and for the love of the goddess stop buying from Amazon.

 

Gus Kenworthy, a freestyle skier who will compete for Team GB at the 2026 Winter Olympics after defecting from Team USA, urinated a political message in the snow:

He later admitted it was urine and I will say this about Gus: he has great penmanship, er penismanship.

 

Tennessee GOP Senator Marsha “I Don’t Own A Brush” Blackburn has urged Chief Justice John Roberts to launch an investigation into liberal Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson because … wait for it, it’s stupid like Marsha … Brown Jackson attended the Grammy Awards last Sunday … because she had been nominated for a Grammy for narrating the audiobook version of her memoir, “Lovely One.”

Blackburn is angry that others at the awards show made anti-ICE jokes:

“While it is by no means unheard of or unusual for a Supreme Court justice to attend a public function, very rarely—if ever—have justices of our nation’s highest Court been present at an event at which attendees have amplified such far-left rhetoric.”

Fuck off, Marsha, you’re just mad Brown Jackson wrote a book and you’ve never read a book.

Oh, and on the flipside Blackburn is facing allegations that she and her campaign engaged in “flagrant violations” of federal and state law by using donations from her Senate campaign for her gubernatorial race.

Has the entire GOP turned into a bunch of grifters?

 

Franklin Graham, one of those so-called religious hacks who haven’t a fucking clue what they are talking about, released this statement about Bad Bunny performing at the Super Bowl Halftime Show:

“Like most Americans, I’ve enjoyed watching the Super Bowl. But the halftime shows began pushing moral boundaries and have become more and more sexualized. This year, they’re having Bad Bunny perform. The NFL leadership is pushing this sexualized agenda. Thank you, TPUSA and Erika Kirk for providing an alternative—The All-American Halftime Show with the agenda of celebrating family, faith, and freedom!”

Graham’s complaint comes one day after critics resurfaced the lyrics to a Kid Rock song entitled, “Balls In Your Mouth” … I will give you the first few lines of this All-American Classic:

Cruising through town in my jacked up truck
Eyes open ’cause I’m scopin for a big butt slut
One that I can take straight back to my house
And have suck my dick and put my balls in her mouth

Graham is naturally getting slaughtered on social media for being an utter asshat.

Y’all know what to do; when they come for Free Speech and the Free Press, when they show themselves to be racist and misogynistic, when you see the grift right before your eyes, trust that it’s true and vote them all out …