The Funny Papers

Bill Bramhall, Dennis Goris, Rick McKee, Daniel Boris, Michael de Adder, Clay Bennett, Gary Huck, Chris Britt, Max Espinoza, Nick Anderson, Adam Zyglis, Pedro X Molina,

Why Is It ...

… that some people have guardian angels while I have a racoon with a crowbar whispering, “Let’s make it worse.”

… that people don’t understand that the actual size of the fucks I don’t give can be seen from space.

… that no one remembers I was taught to think before I act, so if I smack the shiz out of you, rest assured that I have thought about it and am confident in my decision.

… that my new favorite game is Dodgeball but with random people that don’t know they're playing

… that people who are new at my job always ask me  how is it that I never get stressed working there and I always say, “Honestly, I’ve run out of energy to care anymore.”

… that I never take the high road when I could take the psychopath

… that you don’t realize that you cannot gaslight me because I will just agree with you. You think I’m insane? Same.

… that people need to know that if they feel some kind of way about me … awwwwww.

… that I am very aware of who the fuck I am, so people should stop asking.

… that people should be giving me a standing ovation for staying quiet instead of punching them in the face.

The Funny Papers

Michael de Adder, Mike Smith, Clay Bennett, Mike Luckovich, Matt Wuerker, Ed Hall, Bill Bramhall, Dennis Goris, Ann Telnaes, Jack Ohman, Nick Anderson, Deb Milbrath, Liam Simonelli, Tim Campbell,