Thursday, February 10, 2022

Bobservations

Not really a Carlos story, though he was there … the other night we were out dinner in Camden, and a party of ten was seated nearby. Their server came over and was chatting with the group, a family, and asked if it was a special occasion. One man at the head of the table said:

“Our mother’s getting married tomorrow.”

“Oh, congratulations, that should be so much fun.”

Silence, until the man said:

“Our mother’s getting ‘buried’ tomorrow.”

Ouch.

Put me, and clearly Tuxedo, too, in the group that doesn’t care when or why you said the n-word and I still think you should apologize for it.

Inside That censure nonsense the Republican National Committee [RNC] put out this week calling January 6th a “legitimate political discourse” continues to taint the party … especially given this:

The resolution, drafted by David Bossie a longtime Thing 45 lapdog, started out as an effort to expel Cheney and Kinzinger from the House Republican Conference. But an early draft condemned the two representatives for participating in “a Democrat-led persecution of ordinary citizens engaged in nonviolent and legal political discourse.”

Nonviolent. People died. Property damaged. Nonviolent.

Mary Margaret Kreuper, an 80-year-old nun, has been sentenced to a year in prison after she confessed to stealing more than $800,000 from the elementary school where she worked as principal for twenty-eight to fund her gambling trips to Las Vegas.

Kreuper must also pay $825,338 in restitution.

I guess what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay in Vegas if you’re an embezzling nun?

I love music from days gone by, and still remember some of the oldies my mother and father used to play. And so when I hear them now, I instantly know who’s singing, and people seemed stunned I know it; like this:

“Oh, that’s Vikki Carr singing, ‘It Must be him’.”

“How do you know that?”

I then stand on my right foot, bend at the waist and put my left leg straight out behind me, spreading my arms out wide from my side and say:

“I used to skate my long program to this.”

And If I did, I wore this …

Earlier this week we talked about that Rotterdam bridge being dismantled so Jeff Bezos can sail his mega-yacht and miniscule dick under to reach the open sea.

Thanks to reader Marcia la Rue, I learned that Dutch preservationists have said they will pummel the superyacht with rotten eggs if the city of Rotterdam follows through with plans to dismantle a section of that 140-year-old bridge.

It’s almost worth the flight to be able to hurl a rotten egg at Jeff Bezos’ boat ego.

Don't bother walking a mile in my shoes because, to be honest, that would be boring. If you want a true Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride spend 30 seconds in my head. That'll freak you right out.

Arizona’s top House Republican, Speaker Rusty Bowers, is overturning legislation that would have given state lawmakers the power to reject election results.

Toi be fair, Bowers is not killing House Bill 2596, which he could do simply by refusing to assign it to any committee to be considered. Instead, he is assigning the proposal to each and every one of the 12 House committees, because he knows the bill cannot secure approval of each.

This is what people in certain states have to go through to protect elections from other Republicans who want to be able to deny the results of an election simply because they don’t like the outcome.

Arizona? Stand with Bowers and vote out the traitors who would change your vote if it doesn’t go their way.

The other day a client came into our office and as I was talking with her about her project, she told me that I had a beautiful head of hair. And because my brain always goes ‘there’ I said to her:

“Thank you. It’s 100% recycled plastic water bottles.”

Sadly, I think she bought it.

This is Ben Bowers, no relation to Rusty from Arizona; he's a model, actor, hot guy walking. I know nothing more, except that he looks good in a Speedo, but I still ask: Would You Hit It?

15 comments:

  1. That tweet says it all about insecure gun owners - now that's a head I wouldn't want to be in....ever!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, that's a very f*cked up Lara Croft cosplay. Is he wearing shorts AND thigh holsters?
    And that nun! I'd use the noun that rhymes with runt but whoa.
    I totally pictured you ice skating. I totally did.

    XOXO

    ReplyDelete
  3. Married and buried can be the same thing sometimes.
    I may be in the minority *cough* here, but I would like to get rid of the N-word and also the term N-word used to replace the N-word. It's stupid.
    I love Vicki Carr! It Must Be Him is so over the top dramatic. She was one of my singing into the hairbrush stars, along with the Supremes and Johnny Mathis (don't ask).
    Ben Bowers? Meh. Pouty men in Speedos don't do it for me. A smile goes a long way to enticing me to hit it. BH smiles all the time!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh dear, that poor server mishearing "married" and "buried". But I do hope the party got a laugh out of it. Humour (even unintentional) is so good for cutting through the tension!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ben gets a thumbs up.

    Kreuper's 80... she ain't never gonna pay that back, not on a retired nun's salary.

    The repercussions from the "legitimate political discourse" are knocking lots of rotten apples from the Trump tree.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I like your toupee joke! But doesn't it fall off when you do all those jumps and spins in your figure skating routine?

    ReplyDelete
  7. (Carlos - just because) (Tuxedo)
    Figure skating, eh?
    xoxo :-)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I googled the yacht and egging thing ... You can find anything on Google!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I remember in January 21 when Republicans were blaming it on Antifa 🤔🤔🤔

    The party of personal responsibility 🤣🐘🤡

    ReplyDelete
  10. @Helen
    Right? Armed to the teeth while buying lunch. Insecure much?

    @Six
    He’s a sad little man with a tiny penis making up for his shortcomings by arming himself head to toe!
    I imagine she goes to Vegas to try and win back the 800K to pay off her debt!
    I am a terrible ice skater, but I could skate to Vikki Carr!
    xoxo

    @Deedles
    I’ve often thought of Carlos buried, but then digging him up so we can stay married.
    I agree about the word. Some things should just go. I wish we lived in a world where that happened.
    Well, I’ve hairbrushed to Vikki, and Diana, Flo and Mary AND Johnny Mathis, so you’re in good company!
    I like a good pout, it gives me something to strive toward.

    @Treaders
    The group did laugh, and the server’s face was beet red!!

    @Dave
    If that nun hits the craps tables she might be able to do it!

    @Debra
    I use Super Adhesive to keep it on during my spins!

    @TDM
    In my mind I am Olympic quality on the ice!
    xoxo

    @Marcia
    I seriously love the idea!!!

    @Adam
    Antifa AND BLM dressed in MAGAt gear!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I am with you and Tuxedo on 45 and DeSantis. I am afraid he'll be our next president. I have no idea why I have this feeling, but I do.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Married and Buried. For some, it’s the same thing.
    Can we PLEASE shoot rocket into the air containing Desantis, Thing 45, Joe Rogan, and all their friends...
    ... AND the RNC!
    The Embezzling Nun — It could be a movie.
    Where’s the photo of you in the black onesie standing-on-your-right-foot-bending-at-the-waist-left-leg-straight-out-behind-you-spreading-your-arms-wide-from-your-side?
    The Rotterdam/Jeff Bezos story is appalling.
    And if anyone survives a ride in YOUR head, they can try mine.
    I like that Rusty Bowers is making all Arizon Republicans own that legislation, but I hope it doesn’t blow up in his face. I mean, Republicans.
    Your wit and sarcasm is so under-appreciated. Although no one ever compliments me anymore on my beautiful head of hair, I’m often told I have a nice shaped head.
    Ben Bowers, yes.
    I can’t imagine working in a sandwich shop and seeing THAT walk in the door. I’d be immediately ringing 9-1-1.

    ReplyDelete
  13. @Michael
    I think they get a lot of press from the idiotic things they say, and I KNOW that when Democrats vote Democrats win. DeSantis may best Thing 45 as the nominee but I can’t imagine him winning.
    Still, my fingers are crossed.

    @Mitchell
    My first thought about the nun was, ‘When does the Lifetime movie air?’
    Oh, those skating photos of me are locked away in a safe somewhere … or in the hands of my blackmailer. I can’t remember!
    The AZ GOP is up in arms about Bowers but he’s standing firm. I think more in the party are gonna turn rational once it looks like Thing 45 is done.
    Maybe the two of us should open a Take A Whirl In My Head amusement park??
    I have this thing about saying whatever pops into my head and even I have no idea where it comes from. And your head is nice, from what I’ve heard.
    If that gun-toting asshat walked into where I was ordering, I’d cancel, leave, never come back.

    ReplyDelete
  14. So many good ones. Mike 40 years ago I asked a coworker how she was doing, she replied "just terrible" and without listening or paying attention I replied "that's good Margaret!" Married - buried - sound a lot alike. If I felt I needed to be armed like that, I'd move to a better neighborhood, or grow a larger

    ReplyDelete
  15. Huh, a total twit on twitter. Nice. America!

    Ben B. - Zzzzzzz

    Hair. Hair is power. I said this at dinner the other evening and a woman pointed at my face and said, You have hair. You have that. I blinked and said, Yes. Great. And if those turned on by the thought of getting naked with the professor from Lost In Space are so inclined, I might get me a little action.

    Bowers. Interesting gambit. VOTE. Destroy the GOP.

    Love your head. My kind of freak show.

    Hope that yacht sinks.

    Love you in sparkles, darling. And who doesn't adore Vikki Carr?

    So let us get this straight. Diddle children, get shielded, but mess with the money and go directly to jail? Those priests can get away with anything, but a nun tries to have a little fun and the hammer comes down. F the Catholic Church.

    Joe Rogan should eat himself and not be taking advice from a bunch of racists.

    Waiter blunder. Free entertainment.

    Kizzes.



    ReplyDelete

Say anything, but keep it civil .......