Celebrity Randomness

Whitney's comin' back, y'all. She has apparently stepped away from Crack-Is-Wack pipe and has a new album that will be released in September.

I used to like Whitney, before she got all "I'm bigger than the Beatles" and crazy. Before the drugs and the scary anorexia face; before Bobby Brown and his fists of fury.

Now Whitney wants y'all to come with her again.

Only don't ask her anything about drugs, because girl won't talk about that. Not to nobody. Not to Matt Lauer, or Babs Walters. And especially not to Diane Sawyer who aired Crazy Crack Whitney a few years back.

Whitney has swept her drug use under the rug,m y'all. Never happened.

M'kay?

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Some folks should just Shut Up.

I'm talking to you, Candy Spelling. And you, too, Tori. Shaddup!

The mother and daughter are feuding. I know, who cares. But they keep taking their feud to the media, on TV shows and in print, to tell the world how they don't want to resolve their dispute......in the media.

Candy hasn't met her latest grandchild. Boo-freaking-hoo. But she won't meet her at the child's birthday party because it's being taped for Tori's reality show, called something like I Have No Career But I have A Reality Show.

Candy didn't want cameras. She didn't want the media involved the mother, daughter, grandchild reunion.

And how do we know this?

Because she released a statement to the media.

Candy. Count your money and shut up.

Tori. Count your plastic surgeries and shut up.

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If any of you watched the Tony Awards this Sunday, perhaps you saw The Bret Michaels Incident.

It seems Bret--why he was at the Tony's I don't know--had finished his song and was walking back towards the band when a piece of the set came down, as it was supposed to, and struck him in the face.

Bret Michaels busted his lip and fractured his nose.

No gays were harmed in the incident.

Unless you count my anger that his little mishap took the attention off one Miss Stockard Channing.

How dare you, Bret! How dare you!

Stick to VH1 and leave my Tonys alone.

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The wife of convicted murderer, Phil Spector, who was sentenced to 19 years in prison last month for the murder of actress Lana Clarkson, is speaking out about the abuses her husband faces in prison.

Rachelle Spector: "He's locked in a 5-by-9-foot cell 23 and a half hours a day....They treat people worse than animals. I want that known."

Thanks for telling us, dear.

I don't think anyone knew that a man convicted of killing another human being was treated so poorly for his crimes.

I thought celebrity murderers got a room at the Beverly Hills Hotel, but weren't given access to the pool or room service.

Thanks for the education, asshat.