... that these days I feel the need to move a lot of people
from the VIP section of my life and put them in general admission?
… that when one door closes, another one opens, and then
closes, and then opens … it’s the fridge. It’s me in front of the fridge.
… that I feel like I’d be a much better person if I didn’t
have to do it every day?
… that most I’m like my computer. I don’t know if I should
sleep, shut down, or restart?
… that I feel like my superpower is the ability to pick the
grocery checkout line that immediately becomes the slowest line?
… that I think of my mouth as a filter … coffee goes in and sarcasm
comes out.
… that when people ask if I am a cat person or a dog person,
all I can say is that I am not a people person?
… that when I say “the other day” it can be anytime between
yesterday and my birth?
… that nothing refreshes my memory about what I need from
the grocery store more than coming home from the grocery store?
… that one day I was driving down the road and I saw my ex
and suddenly the phrase “I’d hit that” took on an entirely different meaning? |
There's a lot of refrigerator imagery in this one, are you fixating?
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure ...
DeleteI relate to all of these very much! I frequently look in my fridge hoping to find stuff that wasn't in there when I looked two minutes before. I missed you, Bobulah.
ReplyDeleteI've missed you, too, Duchess.
DeleteI love the ex and I'd hit that! I know what you mean. I'd bash into mine and knock him dead.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
That one isn't exactly true as I have no exes in South Carolina ... unless one moved here without my knowledge?
DeleteGosh, you are witty and funny!
ReplyDeleteAnd I can steal some wit and fun, too[ not all of these are mine, you know.
Delete"the other day" -- so, so true, lol!
ReplyDeleteI have a tendency to think things happened recently and then I'll be stunned when I hear the real time/ Over the winter a co-worker remarked how much they liked my coat and asked if it was new and I said, "It's not that new," before I realized I'd had it for 25+ years!
Deletethe dog's mother
ReplyDeleteChortling!
xoxo :-)
We could all use a chortle.
Deletexoxo
Yes, I have missed you and, especially, the "Why is it ..." Column!
ReplyDeleteWhy is it you go shopping, spend a $100, and then tell yourself you have nothing to eat! Yup, I don't get it either!
I'm always shocked that the day after grocery shopping I wonder if there's anything to eat!
DeleteIt DOES suck to have to do it every day.
ReplyDeleteThese are me most days! Except for “the other day”... that’s San Geraldo!
It's hard to be me ... I need a full-time staff.
DeleteYou don't need to ask whether someone is a cat or dog person. Just listen to them when they talk and your query will be answered.
ReplyDeleteTruth!
DeleteI can definitely sympathize about the grocery store line. That is my experience every time!
ReplyDeleteAnd I think about changing lines but then realize as soon as I leave the line I'm in, it'll go faster!
DeleteI am not hungry! I'm conducting an experiment to prove that when I close that fridge door, the light stays on! If I open often enough and fast enough, I'm gonna catch that little sucker! 😉
ReplyDeleteYou could get IN the fridge and then pull the door closed?
DeleteNo, don't do that!
Yeah, I know what you mean. The other day I opened the refrigerator and forgot what I was looking for (of course it didn't matter because I wasn't wearing the right glasses).
ReplyDeleteWill Jay
If you can't see it, you don't need it!
DeleteI really laughed at your last line.
ReplyDeleteThat one is not entirely true for me, but it could be ...
DeleteThe other day, could be 30 years ago.
ReplyDeleteAnd usually is!
DeleteOh most days I'm not a "people person"! And coffee can certainly inspire my sarcasm!
ReplyDeleteMaybe those two together is why I am not a people person???
DeleteAmusing questions because they are so insightful.
ReplyDeleteThere's truth in there somewhere!
DeleteI always love your "why is it" pages, so many apply to me too.
ReplyDeleteJust proves we're not all so different, really!
Delete