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… that when I write the book about all of the things I should have done with my life, I will call it my oughtabiography. … that people talk about multi-tasking I think, “Yeah, I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.” … that no one understands that I don’t leave voicemails; you saw my missed call, that’s my voicemail …. that the only clubs I’m into lately are sandwiches? … that when things go left, I go right … to sleep? … that my boss gets annoyed when I text him every morning to ask if we’re still on for work? … that I am in a panic because I don’t know how to tell the cicadas all that’s happened in the last 17 years? … that the Dildo of Consequences rarely arrives lubed? |
Saturday, June 01, 2024
Why Is It ...
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Usually, it's my boss who calls me to tell me work is still on, and then asks if I could come in early.
ReplyDeleteMy boss knows better than that!
DeleteYou've trained him well...
DeleteIsn't The Dildo of Consequences the official symbol of the US Supreme Court?
ReplyDeleteIt ought to be ...
DeleteJust tell the cicadas what's happened in the last 4 and they'd probably go right back underground!
ReplyDeleteBrilliant idea!! I may go with them.
DeleteHey, I can listen, ignore and forget all at the same time too! Thanks, advancing age.
ReplyDeleteThere are perks to aging!
Deletethe dog's mother
ReplyDeleteoughtabiography!
xoxo :-)
Might be a good read!
Deletexoxo
Im a bog multi tasker when the Dump is on tv. i can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.😂
ReplyDeleteIt does come in handy these days!
Delete🤨 Ha! Those tasks that are begging for multi have no idea who they're dealing with!! I put the Pro in procrastination and I can ignore everything at once!! ✊
ReplyDeleteIt's a gift that I have as well!
DeleteYou saw my post today, so you KNOW where I'm at mentally these days! xoxo
ReplyDeleteYes, ma'am, I do!
Deletexoxo
Rule of life No. 1 Always carry plenty of lube - Just in case. This is a corollary of the Boy Scouts' maxim "Be prepared."
ReplyDeleteWill Jay
Of course the Boy Scouts would be prepared!
DeleteI'm with you on the clubs. As for the "Dildo of Consequences," has it definitely arrived? Are we all supposed to get one?
ReplyDeleteMy addition to this list: "Why is it...that my martini is so small?"
Oh, yes, that last one! YES!!! 🍸🍸🍸
DeleteEmployers should declare more random days off. Just send a message that says, not today dears we have a headache.
ReplyDeleteI like that idea ... perhaps a suggestion at our next work meeting.
DeleteWho knew I was a multi-tasker all these years?!?
ReplyDeleteHuh? What? Who's there? 😁
DeleteIs the Dildo of Consequences related in any way to the Flying Fickle Finger of Fate? I hear that thing is never lubed up.
ReplyDeleteI think it might be the Fickle Finger 2.0!
DeleteIn my case, I can appear to be listening, ignore and forget all at once. It's gotten me into trouble many times.
ReplyDeleteThat is one of it's downfalls!
DeleteLately, that's my version of multi-tasking too.
ReplyDeleteIt kinda simplifies things in a way.
Delete