Why Is It ...

… that people don’t understand that they shouldn’t be rude to me as my rude will out-rude your rude and I will make you cry.

… that I don’t know how some people can fake their feelings. I can’t even fake a Hello to someone I don’t like.

… that I love a piping hot cup of coffee on a cold morning because it warms up the evil in me.

… that since they say that age comes from wisdom, I tell people I don’t have wrinkles, I have wise cracks.

… that with age comes the ability not to give a rat’s ass.

… that I always tell people different stories about my life, so that when they gossip me they all start to argue.

… that I am not as unhinged as I could be and y’all should be grateful for that.

… that most people are scared to say stuff, but I’m not and that’s why only three people like me.

I Didn't Say It ...

Sue Altman, Democrat running for the US House of Representatives in New Jersey's 7th District, on the topic of trans inclusion in sports:

"If we decide as a society that making rules about who is and who isn’t female is more important than giving young children a chance to be on teams and compete and to be part of something bigger than themselves, especially young people who are more susceptible to suicide and bullying, then I think we’ve lost our way a little bit. As someone who’s been working to advocate for women’s rights and women's sports, I promise you that in the locker rooms of women's sports teams, we’re not super worried about this. We've been worried about getting equal access to gym time, good referees, good trainers so you don’t get injured, fair shake at scholarships, equal pay at the higher levels. I will let individual sport committees decide the highest, highest-level things, but at the very heart of it, we have to respect people of all genders and give young children, especially young people and adolescents struggling with their gender identity, the chance to compete."

Huh. Common sense and respect. That’s how it should be, not name calling and shaming and lying.

Common sense and respect.

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Hung Cao, the GOP Senate nominee in Virginia, disparaging drag queens and people who are tolerant of them during a debate:

“When you’re using a, you know, drag queen to recruit for the Navy, that’s not the people we want. What we need is alpha males and alpha females who are going to rip out their own guts, eat them and ask for seconds. Those are young men and women that are going to win wars.”

Oh honey, say that to a drag queens face and then talk about guts being ripped out.

Of note is that Cao has said that he is running for office in Virginia to stop witchcraft that he says is running rampant in California. Now, I dunno, but it sounds to me like someone has had his brain ripped out.

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Caroline Giuliani, Drunkle Rudy’s daughter, says she’s backing Vice President Kamala Harris in  the upcoming election:

“After months of feeling the type of sorrow that comes from the death of a loved one, it dawned on me that I’ve been grieving the loss of my dad to [The Felon]. I cannot bear to lose our country to him too.”

Sorry to say, but your father is a lost cause and I think if, and/or when, he goes to jail and The Felon all but gives up on him, your father will still be kissing that grifter’s ring.

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Daniel Radcliffe, on the passing of his beloved co-star Maggie Smith:

"The first time I met Maggie Smith, I was 9 years old, reading scenes for 'David Copperfield,' my first job. I knew little about her, except my parents were in awe. I also knew she was a Dame, so I asked, 'Would you like me to call you Dame?' She laughed and said, 'Don't be ridiculous!' Maggie had a fierce intellect, a sharp tongue, and could intimidate and charm simultaneously. She was, as everyone will attest, incredibly funny. I consider myself extremely lucky to have worked with her and shared time on set. The word 'legend' is overused, but if it applies to anyone in our industry, it's Maggie. Thank you, Maggie."

She sounds fabulous and she will be missed.

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Corey DeAngelis, “anti-woke” campaigner, a so-called “school choice evangelist” and “parental rights” activist, talking about his time as a gay website performer:

“As an activist for parental rights and school choice, my passion is personal. Just like everyone else, I have made mistakes throughout my life, learned from those mistakes, used that as an opportunity to grow and tried to channel that experience into something positive. I was a victim of poor decisions and poor influences. I have turned that experience into the fuel that fires me to save young people from being put in the same position I was put in and to help parents protect their children. I will never stop fighting for what is right.”

Let me get this queer for you: Corey likes dick, and he still likes dick, but he’s sorry he got caught liking dick.

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Jake Shears, the former Scissor Sisters frontman, on his difficulty meeting guys:

“I don’t feel like men check each other out [in London]. There’s not a lot of just flirting with guys here at all. There’s no acknowledgement of one another, even if you’re going to the same gym every day. I feel in other cities, New York ... LA, people definitely acknowledge each other a little more, talk to each other, check each other out, flirt, cruise and I don’t see that very much here at all. I’m not great on the apps. They don’t really work that well for me, so that’s kind of off the table. And ... the bars are kind of gone. The sort of gay bars we used to go on a weeknight, that sort of culture is missing now. The Joiners Arms [a beloved London gay bar that closed] or flirting with guys or like taking somebody home ... I can’t remember the last time that that happened. I do think it’s a nightlife issue and just the apps taking that off the table. People rely on the apps for that so they don’t have to do it in person.”

When you rely on an app or a computer or a phone to make the first move you are kind of missing out on the thrill of meeting someone. It’s all so clinical and precise whereas in person it can get messy and funny and real.

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Bobservations

Some of you may remember the story of how we survived Hurricane Katrina in Miami—losing only the fence and part of the roof—and how that lead to our decision to move from Florida. But did you know that Carlos and I handle hurricanes differently? That Carlos falls asleep at the drop of as hat and I stay awake wondering if the house will fly away like Dorothy’s in The Wizard of Oz?

Well, as we waited for Helene to arrive I told a coworker about Carlos’s nonchalance regarding the storms and the day after the storm, when we were without power for over 14 hours, Carlos and I drove through Camden seeing what, if anything, was damaged or open or what. We ended up by my office and I noticed a couple of cars in the lot so we stopped to check and the guy I had talked to about Carlos’s hurricane reactions was there, and we started talking storm when the guy said to me:

“How did Carlos do during the storm? Did he stay awake?”

And before I could utter a sound, Carlos goodnaturedly shouted:

“I’m fucking blind! I couldn’t see a thing!”

So, that’s how he handled it.

This Tuxedo Memory if from April 2020 and entitled Things I Like #7:

A while back Maddie posted a series of posts about called Things I Like where the posts displayed Maddie’s home and some favorite things.

I took a look around the house and started with our sunroom and the plants Carlos has there, but then I came upon my absolute favorite thing …

Wasn’t he gorgeous?

I rarely go to Walmart but if they have cakes like that there, I may have to rethink my position on that store!

The great, and I mean The Great Maggie Smith—The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie to California Suite to A Room with a View to Tea with Mussolini to the Harry Potter films to The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel to The Lady in The Van to Downton Abbey—passed away last week at age 89.

RIP Dame Margaret Natalie Smith and thank you for the decades of entertainment.

The Catholic Diocese of Rockville Centre in New York announced a proposed global settlement with hundreds of sex abuse survivors, who allege they were abused as children at the DRVC’s parishes, churches, and schools.

The settlement is based on DRVC’s parishes filing for bankruptcy, and it will halt a number of jury trials against the Diocese and its parishes. The law firm of Slater Slater Schulman served as a mediation party in the historic settlement, under which a trust will receive approximately $320.5 million for the benefit of survivors.

$320,000,000.00.

Oh, and then Pope Francis promised to “offer all the help we can” to aid clergy sexual abuse victims, after a group of Belgian survivors told him first-hand of the trauma that had shattered their lives and left many in poverty and mental misery.

Howsabout turning the child rapists into the authorities to have them prosecuted? Oh, but the shame on the church …

Fuck you, Francis.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s marriage may be over, but fans still love Mr. & Mrs. Smith even if La Jolie does not. 

And she does not; Jolie was photographed autographing a movie poster for the 2005 action flick and seemed quite stoic about doing so, even averting her eyes from Pitt’s picture on the poster.

Oh Angie, you picked him …

Teo Toranzo is an Italian model, based in Brazil, who doesn’t shy away from an avant-garde photo shoot but the real issue is: Would You Hit It?

Architecture Wednesday: FarmHouse, BeachHouse

Either way it’s a new house with an old soul and a one-of-a-kind Rockport retreat, a mere block from Fulton Beach Rd and daily sunrises over Aransas Bay. The house sits on two and a half acres, set back from the street with a tree-lined private drive. Pulling up you'll immediately feel a sense of tranquility and likely be greeted by some of the abundant wildlife that also calls this land home.

The home allows one to feel connected with the landscape from every room. Every detail showcases creativity in design—vintage, antique and eclectic objects along with repurposed materials and fixtures that all have personal stories. Walking through the front door, the living-dining-kitchen great room has vaulted reclaimed barn wood ceilings, white-washed shiplap walls, and concrete floors. The barn wood is echoed in the kitchen cabinet fronts, with open upper shelving, an old butcher block embedded in the island, and a vintage family farm sink. Off the kitchen is what the owners like to call their "shipping and receiving" room, where a whirlwind of activities get managed and processed—mail, groceries, laundry, pet grooming, and of course entertaining.

There are three bedrooms and three bathrooms in this 2,515 square foot home; the first guest bedroom has a private entrance from the front porches, where an outdoor shower completes the full hallway bath. A second guest room has an ensuite full bath and special play loft. The large primary bedroom features double doors leading out to the pool or onto a private back porch. Both the guest and primary baths feature board-formed concrete showers and tubs, and the primary bath shower features custom Mexican cement tile.

The flow of indoor and outdoor living is unparalleled, with almost 2,500 square feet of covered porches including a 40 foot-tall screened pool “barn.” With plenty of space for grilling, dining, and relaxing, the space allows for year-round outdoor living and panoramic views of iconic windswept oaks.

No details were missed in creating this oasis, including a 1000-gallon stainless steel rainwater cistern system with pump, hurricane impact glass doors and windows, and standing seam metal roof. An additional acre is available to purchase if a buyer chooses … after you plunk down $1.67 million for the home!

Dwell

Meme Dump