Bobservations

The other night, as Carlos was getting into bed,  I went into the bathroom and closed the door. My phone was charging on the counter so I quickly checked my messages but then dropped the phone on the counter. I thought nothing of it and went into the back part of the bathroom, sat down and was doing some business when, from the other side of the door:

“Did you call me?”

“Why would I call you?”

“My phone says you called me.”

“Can we discuss this when I’m finished in here?”

So, I finished and went to get into bed and I asked again:

“Why would I call you?”

“I thought you fell.”

“And so I reached up from the floor to the counter, took my phone and called you? Why wouldn’t I just shout, ‘I’ve fallen and I can get up?’”

“I thought maybe you were unconscious—”

“Unconscious but still able to stand, find the phone and call you but not shout your name or, I dunno, walk out of the room?”

“Go to bed.”

“Let me get my phone and call you …”

Laughter ensued.

This Tuxedo Says is from July 2021 …

Again, Tuxedo isn’t allowed to vote, but if he could, he clearly comes down on the other side of that party.

I cringe to think of what he might say if he saw that party and what they were doing today.

I saw a preview of a new film on TV and nearly died …

“Melanie” is an American … hold for laughter … political documentary film directed and produced by Brett Ratner that documents the First Hooker of the United States, in the twenty days before her rapist husband’s second presidential inauguration.

I don’t like the name … I like “From Whore House to White House” or “I Became a Millionaire Flat on My Back” or “I’m In The Files, Too” or “Sloppy Slovenian Hooker.”

What do you think it should be called?

Please remember that Turning Point USA was founded in 2012 by Charlie Kirk and Bill Montgomery with two major priorities: fighting COVID restrictions and gun control.

Montgomery died of COVID. Kirk was shot to death. Karma is real.

Little Marco Rubio and Pammy Pedophile Protector Bondi are saying that Maduro will stand trial in an American courtroom.

So, does that mean the US can prosecute foreign leaders even when it doesn’t hold its own president accountable for his crimes.

The hypocrisy is real … real stupid.

Everyone seems really surprised that Nicki Minaj has suddenly gone full MAGAt Cult Member but it happened just as she’s about to lose her $20,000,000 mansion and her husband needs a pardon.

She’s taking the grift route … sell your soul to save your life.

MAGAts cheered when businesses were told they could discriminate against people, but when a Hilton Hotel refuses to allow ICE a play to stay, the cult goes nuts.

Again, the hypocrisy is real … stupid.

And while we’re on stupid … here’s Cankles and his band of drunken traitors holding court during the attack on Venezuela. Note the black curtains … this was staged at Mar-Illegal where he wanted to look like Obama when bin Laden was killed but … Cankles phone is unplugged.

You cannot make this shiz up.

Matias Piana is a Miami-born model with Italian and Uruguayan roots who speaks English, Spanish, and Italian and so anyway you ask it: Would You Hit It? … ¿Lo golpearías? … Lo faresti?